Conversations with Briana: Staying Open

In this video, Briana opens an important discussion about how to stay open and not shut down in the throes of challenging times and uncomfortable situations. Many of us tend to close our hearts off when we feel sad, afraid, or “triggered”.

Closing off is actually not a very effective tactic … Feeling and inviting everything in fully is a much more pragmatic way of processing it, moving through it, and letting it go for the benefit of everyone involved.

Please share your questions, tips, or stories from personal experience in the comments below! We’d love to hear from you!

23 thoughts on “Conversations with Briana: Staying Open

  1. This came at perfect timing! This is exactly what I teach my clients, and it’s always such a gift to have it returned when I need it the most. Thank you <3

    1. You’re welcome. So glad you help your clients with this too!

  2. Just journaled a bit about how the strong part of me “protects” the fragile part of me…then listened to your encouraging words. Perfect timing.

    1. Such perfect timing!

  3. Briana, thank you for this! Oh my goodness… I am just realizing that I ALWAYS close down around my hurts, pains and triggers…sadly, that’s just how I roll. I attended a trauma recovery program back in Nov/Dec 2017. And although I was able to do some very Sacred inner work on myself to process through and then release so many old issues and debilitating hurts for myself … I see that today, I have been living my life, still, in a constant state of fear and ‘on high alert’. Fear of being hurt again in a similar way from my past… and this, of course, is only drawing to myself more of the same. And so I have been closing myself down around all of my current pains, hurts, triggers and fears. Building yet a new arsenal of trauma for myself to have to, one day, dig deep again to pull up and then release.😔 So… what struck me so deeply about what I have just heard you say here… is, the fact that we usually can’t avoid these things that come in and hurt us… but we can deal with them in that moment and then allow them to pass right on through us. Then we will only be left with the blessing from that lesson in our life✨. This concept is a new option for me! One that I have never been aware of before and I feel like you …and your gentle and insightful teachings in this video … are a life-saving gift to me today.❤️ Thank you from the bottom of my heart for helping me and for sharing your beautiful light!
    Xo, Sarah

    1. Thank you for sharing Sarah. I’m so grateful to hear how this video touched you and I wish you so much grace in the process of moving the pain through. Love love, Briana

    2. I have a similar experience and also have just recently came back from a Betrayal/Loss recovery program down at the 1440 Multiversity. And wouldn’t you know… been struggling with the complex concepts they helped me learn while there. Your video is exactly what I needed to hear in the wake of this experience.
      Love and peace from beautiful northern CA,

  4. “Transient experience turns to TRAPPED actual problem!” I witness the truth to this teaching. Burdened, carrying many traps. How could I have missed such obviousness? What a beautiful lesson to be aware of!! In an effort to recall and resource this I shared your timely, resonant, teaching. Potential to be a life changing concept! “Trust self to manage….welcome in and LET PASS THROUGH.” Trust SELF!! (Agreement keeping…step one to self trust. Change is a big process.)

    1. Change is a big process and every lasting as well. Thank you for your sweet comment

  5. I love this. Thank you. Such a good reminder. Clenching up around the discomfort, pain, ugliness traps that feeling… that is so true! I’ve been imagining those feelings to come in and ground out based on a practice I learned from you. It’s not always easy but it is already making a big difference and I’m feeling more courageous. I feel like I don’t have to reject or resist the stuff that’s hard so much and it’s making me generally less “uptight” 🙂

    1. Yay to feeling courageous!!

  6. I loved the suggestion of the heart meditation. I know I avoid experiences for fear of getting hurt, but I know that by avoiding I am also cheating myself out of learning to cope. Thanks for sharing your wisdom.

    1. You’re welcome.

  7. Wonderful, thank you !

    1. You’re welcome.

  8. I find myself closing up when I become overstimulated and overwhelmed. I am a Highly Sensitive Person but also a High Sensation Seeker. Sometimes I go past my limit because I love meeting people (I am also an extrovert). Finding new connections that I didn’t realize were there before make my heart sing.

    Closing up mostly impacts my business and its ability to consistently and sustainably exist and grow. I’ve been practicing over the past 3 years finding my middle way so I don’t creep too far into the extreme of overstimulation but it still happens. Its challenging b/c its never the same all the time. After a death in the family, or being pregnant, or traveling…these can all change the threshold of being overstimulated. I’ve learned to create lots of space/self-care in my life and do spurts of work throughout the week that are the most essential to keep things going. My best strategy is to simply stay present with myself and everything around me and allowing the experiences to move through me (rather than grasp on and become stuck in me) as you mentioned. I also do weekly assessments that allow me to see what is working for me/my business, what is not, and what I can do differently for the next week. This helps me tremendously. Thank you <3

    1. Thank you for sharing with me. I love that you have a weekly practice of getting super present with what is and isn’t working.

  9. I don’t feel that I close off in terms of my heart. I feel that I make clothes off in terms of my mind. Whatever is triggering me will cause me not to listen. I don’t understand where my heart which is always open will be closed off but rather I need to focus I believe on my mind by listening better.

    1. Concetta, regardless of whether you feel like it’s a mind closing or a heart closing (I’d argue that it’s probably both as we don’t usually have our hearts open and not listen) I think you’d benefit from the same exercise presented in this video. Maybe just try it and see what you think.

  10. Really beautifully explained🙏❤️

  11. Hi Briana
    I do have a question about this. I study a lot of Pema Chodrons teachings and feel this is similar to compassion training and staying present in any situation. I totally get the meditation part you offered and have tried it several times becoming very familiar with both the closed and open heart and how it feels in my body. Thank you for that. To take this further what would you suggest for staying open in the present moment (as a situation is unfolding) ? If the closing is often a reflexive reaction established by past experiences how do I keep my heart open in real time?

    1. Hi Karen.

      I would say the best thing to do is just to practice staying open again and again – catch yourself closing, know the sensation, and then choose to stay open as much as you can.


      1. Briana – thank you for responding, Yes. You are right and I will continue to practice in that manner. It certainly isn’t easy!
        Many blessings – karen

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