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A few weeks ago we had a dozen Dragontree managers staying at our house for a 2020 planning session. There were lots of laughs and lots of great ideas. It was a wonderful reminder to me of the power of group consciousness.
We need only to look at the state of the world to understand the prevailing group consciousness on our planet. An individual has a big idea. This inspires a small group to adopt the idea and it grows. Increasing numbers of people are attracted. They hold the idea in their consciousness, they share it, they imbue it with their energy. And large-scale reality changes.
If you want to make an idea real, enlist the power of group consciousness – even if that group only consists of two people. When you do something with a likeminded friend, it’s more likely to succeed. This is why we talk so much about doing your life planning with your partner or a supportive group of comrades.
Numerous bands of Dreambookers have formed and they’ve shared that the collective energy inspires them to dream bigger, to get realer, and to express these dreams to each other. There’s something magic about telling another person of a dream which you’ve previously kept to yourself.
Besides the synergy that occurs when more than one mind is holding an intention, doing planning with others promotes clarity and alignment. This is especially important for those whose lives are intertwined. Whether you use the Dreambook or another tool, sharing this process hugely increases the likelihood that your plans are going to work out in a mutually beneficial and harmonious way.
It’s easy to see the downsides to not planning together: you’ll probably be out of sync; you may want things that are in direct opposition to one another and you won’t have the chance to forge a compromise; you may end up in circumstances that are good for one person but not the other; you may even subconsciously sabotage each other’s plans because of an unrecognized belief your partner’s plan may infringe on or contradict your own.
But the upsides are hopefully an even better reason to plan together:
You get to experience the alchemy of two (or more) people’s urge to grow and create. When you’re both aiming for a shared future, each person consciously adds their own colors and strokes to the canvas and the result is a more beautiful and integrated work of art than if you had crafted two works independently. You get to say, “Here’s what I want,” and they say, “Here’s what I want,” and together you stretch and grow, engage your creative power, and hold the space for a magnificent, fulfilling outcome. If you can your whole family or peer group involved in the co-visioning and co-creation process, that’s all the more energy flowing in the same direction.
You get to build plans that play off each other’s strengths and drives. Rather than each person doing everything themselves, the different roles in a shared plan can be managed by whomever is best suited to them. And if one person having an off day, the other person can carry the baton.
You get to use each other as a sounding board. When you discuss your future plans with someone who knows and cares about you, they can offer vital feedback. They might see what you don’t – that you’re pursuing something that’s no longer in line with your values; that you’re charging too little for your services; that you could be dreaming bigger; that you’re going about a task in a way that’s unnecessarily difficult; etc.
Inevitably, planning with another person, whether it’s a friend or a life partner, is going to push you (and your plan) to grow in ways that are less likely to occur when you’re doing it on your own. It’s harder to stay in your comfort zone when there are others involved. In fact, we may want to plan independently because we know this. “If I don’t tell anyone my plan,” we might think, “no one can tell me it’s a bad idea.” Or, “If I don’t tell my partner what I have in mind for the future, we won’t have to discover that we’re incompatible.” But opening up the conversation – with someone who genuinely supports you to live to your potential – is the only way to ensure that it’s going to work for the highest good of everyone involved.
Do you use the Dreambook with a friend? With your partner? What have you experienced with consciously co-creating?
Be well,
Peter
P.S. By the way, I was inspired to write about group consciousness by a passage I recently encountered in Conversations with God by Neale Donald Walsch:
“Group consciousness is something that is not widely understood—yet it is extremely powerful and can, if you are not careful, often overcome individual consciousness. You must always, therefore, endeavor to create group consciousness wherever you go, and with whatever you do, if you wish your larger life experience on the planet to be harmonious. . . . If you cannot find a group whose consciousness matches your own, be the source of one. Others of like consciousness will be drawn to you.
Individuals and smaller groups must affect larger groups—and, ultimately, the largest group of all, which is ALL humankind—for there to be permanent and significant change on your planet. Your world, and the condition it is in, is a reflection of the total, combined consciousness of everyone living there.”
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About 20 years ago, I started thinking about whether my name was right for me. Like most people, I neither loved nor hated it, and I felt it was kind of silly or frivolous to consider changing it. But I wasn’t sure that the name Peter was serving me anymore.
Around that time, I met a Vedic astrologer named Bharat who offered to draw up my chart. Based on the time and place of my birth, he told me my first name should ideally start with the sound “Lo.” It just so happens that my middle name is Logan, which felt like quite a coincidence, and the idea of going by my middle name seemed less eccentric than changing it to something entirely new.
I was acquainted with an elderly woman who had a reputation for knowing what the right name for a person was, so I decided to get her opinion. We were in a dance class together, and after class one day I asked her what she thought about my going by Logan instead of Peter. “Let me think about it,” she replied.
A week later she told me, “If you went by Logan, a part of your personality that comes through with the ‘Pee’ sound in Peter would be lost. And I like that part.”
I trusted her, so I let go of the idea of calling myself Logan, but I continued to feel that I might be limited by my name. There was a growing sense that every time I used this name I was reinforcing the notion that my identity is the history, beliefs, and personality of Peter Logan Borten.
I started to feel differently about people who changed their names as part of a healing process or spiritual awakening. I realized that it must have taken a lot of courage. They risked weirding-out their friends, family, and coworkers for the sake of something more important – their own freedom and potential.
In our advanced level Dragontree Life Coaching training last weekend, we did a day-long process about death. More striking than the fears people had about the death of their bodies was the angst – and liberation – surrounding the death of their ego (including their personal history and all of their stories about themselves).
Part of the process was giving a title to an internal story. Any time you find yourself feeling like a victim, like life is treating you unfairly, or that things aren't going according to the plan, it can be useful to determine if there’s a story that you’re subconsciously participating in and then give it a title. For instance: “I Lost My Only Chance at True Love” or “I Always Hold Back From My True Potential” or “Nobody Respects Me.” There are small stories and big, overarching stories.
Often, we’re unaware of the stories we’ve constructed, but when we come up with a title it's easy to see how much we comply with the narrative. We can be so insistent on the validity of the story that we’re almost compelled to keep playing the tragic main character.
Two of the big questions that came up in our weekend were, “How am I limited by this identity?” and “Who would I be without it?” We avoid abandoning the story because: (1) it means we were “wrong” about this story being true, (2) it means doing something new, unknown, and uncomfortable, and (3) it means letting go of whatever “benefits” we may have derived from perpetuating that story. But I encourage you to take a moment to feel into that second question. What if you were able to let go of all of your stories and identities – who would you be? What would you do? How would life feel?
Our stories are usually attached to the name of the main character. Sometimes the bond is very strong, other times weaker. In many cultures, taking a new name upon beginning a new chapter is an established and culturally acceptable rite, but that’s not often the case in the West. So, do we need to get rid of our name in order to let go of our story?
In my opinion, it’s not essential but for many people it makes liberation and empowerment easier. I can tell you with utter certainty and conviction that I am not Peter Logan Borten. Peter Logan Borten is the name assigned to this body and the personality attached to it, but the name Peter Logan Borten doesn't come close to encompassing my true identity. This is also true for the Being bearing your name. Numerous religions say the same about assigning a name to God. The first line of the Daoist classic, Dao De Jing, is “The Dao that can be named is not the true Dao.”
Even if your name doesn’t feel like a heavy weight, perhaps you can still perceive that you’re less than your Whole, Authentic Self when you’re playing the part of the character who has your name. If so, I recommend doing some journaling on this. Consider these questions:
- How do you feel about your name?
- Who is [insert your name here]?
- What’s one (or more) of your limiting stories?
- When you play the part of [your name] how are you limited?
- Who would you be without this identity?
- How does it feel to consider letting go of your name?
- Is there another name that feels right for you? A name without baggage – and better yet, a name that feels like it would unleash new potential?
If you do feel baggage attached to your current name, but, like most people, you’re not willing to change it, see if you can “cleanse” the name. Imagine you’re deleting all of your name’s “cookies” like you’d do to clear your web browser’s history – release all old perspectives and associations. Or come up with your own process for refreshing that name and making it your own, such as writing it on a piece of paper and burning it; writing it on something washable and immersing it in water; reclaiming it, loving it, breathing new life into it; making art that’s centered around your name, etc.
You could also watch how you introduce yourself, and rather than making your name your identity by saying, for instance, “I AM Peter,” make the subtle change to, “My name’s Peter.” If a name comes to you that would feel fresh and liberating, you can try using it just with yourself, or share it with only those with whom you’re most comfortable.
Notice what happens. Does it feel different when people use your name? Do you feel freer to be yourself when you use a different name or have “cleansed” your current name? Share with us below. Have you changed your name? What was your experience with retiring your given name and choosing a new one?
Be well,
The Being Formerly Known as Peter
[post_title] => A Rose by any other Name would Smell as Sweet
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In this video, Briana opens an important discussion about how to stay open and not shut down in the throes of challenging times and uncomfortable situations. Many of us tend to close our hearts off when we feel sad, afraid, or "triggered".
Closing off is actually not a very effective tactic ... Feeling and inviting everything in fully is a much more pragmatic way of processing it, moving through it, and letting it go for the benefit of everyone involved.
Please share your questions, tips, or stories from personal experience in the comments below! We'd love to hear from you!
[post_title] => Conversations with Briana: Staying Open
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A few weeks ago we had a dozen Dragontree managers staying at our house for a 2020 planning session. There were lots of laughs and lots of great ideas. It was a wonderful reminder to me of the power of group consciousness.
We need only to look at the state of the world to understand the prevailing group consciousness on our planet. An individual has a big idea. This inspires a small group to adopt the idea and it grows. Increasing numbers of people are attracted. They hold the idea in their consciousness, they share it, they imbue it with their energy. And large-scale reality changes.
If you want to make an idea real, enlist the power of group consciousness – even if that group only consists of two people. When you do something with a likeminded friend, it’s more likely to succeed. This is why we talk so much about doing your life planning with your partner or a supportive group of comrades.
Numerous bands of Dreambookers have formed and they’ve shared that the collective energy inspires them to dream bigger, to get realer, and to express these dreams to each other. There’s something magic about telling another person of a dream which you’ve previously kept to yourself.
Besides the synergy that occurs when more than one mind is holding an intention, doing planning with others promotes clarity and alignment. This is especially important for those whose lives are intertwined. Whether you use the Dreambook or another tool, sharing this process hugely increases the likelihood that your plans are going to work out in a mutually beneficial and harmonious way.
It’s easy to see the downsides to not planning together: you’ll probably be out of sync; you may want things that are in direct opposition to one another and you won’t have the chance to forge a compromise; you may end up in circumstances that are good for one person but not the other; you may even subconsciously sabotage each other’s plans because of an unrecognized belief your partner’s plan may infringe on or contradict your own.
But the upsides are hopefully an even better reason to plan together:
You get to experience the alchemy of two (or more) people’s urge to grow and create. When you’re both aiming for a shared future, each person consciously adds their own colors and strokes to the canvas and the result is a more beautiful and integrated work of art than if you had crafted two works independently. You get to say, “Here’s what I want,” and they say, “Here’s what I want,” and together you stretch and grow, engage your creative power, and hold the space for a magnificent, fulfilling outcome. If you can your whole family or peer group involved in the co-visioning and co-creation process, that’s all the more energy flowing in the same direction.
You get to build plans that play off each other’s strengths and drives. Rather than each person doing everything themselves, the different roles in a shared plan can be managed by whomever is best suited to them. And if one person having an off day, the other person can carry the baton.
You get to use each other as a sounding board. When you discuss your future plans with someone who knows and cares about you, they can offer vital feedback. They might see what you don’t – that you’re pursuing something that’s no longer in line with your values; that you’re charging too little for your services; that you could be dreaming bigger; that you’re going about a task in a way that’s unnecessarily difficult; etc.
Inevitably, planning with another person, whether it’s a friend or a life partner, is going to push you (and your plan) to grow in ways that are less likely to occur when you’re doing it on your own. It’s harder to stay in your comfort zone when there are others involved. In fact, we may want to plan independently because we know this. “If I don’t tell anyone my plan,” we might think, “no one can tell me it’s a bad idea.” Or, “If I don’t tell my partner what I have in mind for the future, we won’t have to discover that we’re incompatible.” But opening up the conversation – with someone who genuinely supports you to live to your potential – is the only way to ensure that it’s going to work for the highest good of everyone involved.
Do you use the Dreambook with a friend? With your partner? What have you experienced with consciously co-creating?
Be well,
Peter
P.S. By the way, I was inspired to write about group consciousness by a passage I recently encountered in Conversations with God by Neale Donald Walsch:
“Group consciousness is something that is not widely understood—yet it is extremely powerful and can, if you are not careful, often overcome individual consciousness. You must always, therefore, endeavor to create group consciousness wherever you go, and with whatever you do, if you wish your larger life experience on the planet to be harmonious. . . . If you cannot find a group whose consciousness matches your own, be the source of one. Others of like consciousness will be drawn to you.
Individuals and smaller groups must affect larger groups—and, ultimately, the largest group of all, which is ALL humankind—for there to be permanent and significant change on your planet. Your world, and the condition it is in, is a reflection of the total, combined consciousness of everyone living there.”
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