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As a young adult living in Western Massachusetts, I had a handful of friends who attended Hampshire College. Hampshire is well known for being highly unconventional. There are no majors, no departments, and no grades. So much of the program is up to the student, including a final yearlong project. I could see why it was appealing, especially to people who didn’t seem to fit into typical academic institutions.
When I first heard these friends talk of the wonderfully freeform nature of their college experience, I was envious. In later years, as they found it increasingly challenging to keep themselves on course, I remember saying, “That kind of program wouldn’t work for me.” I realized, with no shame at all, that I needed way (way) more hand-holding. Only one of my Hampshire friends graduated. I guess they needed more hand-holding too.
There are a number of reasons we avoid getting help or taking direction:
- We’re too proud to admit we need help.
- We’re afraid of opening up, being vulnerable, or appearing weak.
- We think nobody is capable of helping us.
- We don’t want to be controlled or guided in a way we don’t like.
- We don’t want to be told what to do.
- We don’t want to be a burden.
- We don’t want to share the credit.
- We feel it’s less of an accomplishment if we get help.
- We believe we need to do things all by ourselves.
This last one is a common inherited belief, though nearly every impressive historical figure had a team of supporters. Yes, there’s a grain of truth to it: each of us is responsible for ourselves, our choices and actions. Each of us is responsible for how we show up in the world. Nobody can do the internal work for us. But it’s perfectly okay to get tons of help along the way. It doesn’t diminish the outcome. In fact, we connect and improve through the process when we let others in. This is true even when it comes to healing and spirituality. It’s time to let go of the “Lone Ranger complex.”
Guidance and mutual support are an important part of why our program, Sacred Expansion, has been so successful. We created Sacred Expansion as a prerequisite for our life coaching trainees, as we feel it’s important to “clean house” before guiding others. It was designed to help people get to know themselves more deeply, release old unhealthy patterns, and open to a state of greater intuition and trust – all within a group of others on the same journey.
It turned out to be so monumental for our early participants that we decided to make Sacred Expansion available as a stand-alone course. Enrollment is happening NOW! You’ll be lovingly led by my wife, Briana, through an exploration of yourself through the metaphors of the seasons. And you’ll come out of it with greater clarity and self-awareness, less baggage, a deeper connection to Spirit, and the tools to continue the process on your own. I encourage you to do it!
Also, I recommend you look back at that list of reasons we avoid getting help and see if there are any that ring a bell for you. If so, consider the following questions. Is this belief true? (E.g., Is it true that nobody could help me? Is it true that if I asked for help, it would compromise me in some critical way? Is it true that it’s less of an accomplishment if I get help?) And then meditate on what life might be like if you felt completely at ease and unembarrassed about asking for help and graciously receiving it?
Be well,
Peter
P.S. Early Bird pricing for Sacred Expansion is currently in progress. Sign up today and save $200! On August 17th, the price goes up, so if you want to join us, don't miss this opportunity!
Click here to enroll today!
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When we read about historical figures or people in the news, it’s easy to get the message that it’s big things that make a life exceptional, that the individuals who climb Mount Everest, develop a vaccine, or save a species from the brink of extinction are defining greatness for us all. If that’s what you feel called to do, I don’t want to lower the bar for you. I love massive achievements that benefit the common welfare!
But I also want to put in a good word for the consistent accomplishment of small things. Over a lifetime, this, too, can amount to something exceptional.
I’ve treated a number of patients with huge accomplishments under their belts – founders and CEOs of giant companies, inventors, professional athletes, artists, musicians, and authors. Clearly, they derived satisfaction from those big successes, but the day-to-day ingredients of happiness are the same for them as for anyone else. And, in general, I wouldn’t say they were happier or more satisfied with their lives than most people.
These ingredients are things like: connection with people, animals, nature, and Spirit; savoring food, music, and beauty; serving others and contributing to one’s community; completing meaningful tasks; learning and bettering oneself; and being present with the here and now so that we feel the magic of it. These “small things” aren’t highly visible, but they amount to so much.
This is one of the main reasons Briana and I started to create our own planner about a decade ago. We had always relied on planners, but found that traditional planners caused us to focus mainly on appointments and tasks. That’s what they’re for, right?
Appointments and tasks are useful, of course, but if this is what we fill our planner with, our life map can easily become defined by the things we need to get done. We wanted to create something that would (1) encourage us to define and adhere to an overarching vision and plan for our life (so that we’d consciously relate to our appointments and tasks as contributing to that plan), and (2) help us to prioritize the vital ingredients mentioned above.
Thus, the Dreambook was born. Through tools like Habit Tracking, Rituals for Thriving, defining your gifts, values, and purpose, and getting crystal clear on the aspects of life that truly nourish you, you can start to move these elements to the forefront – rather than the “extra credit” status they may currently occupy.
We can’t all devote our lives to world-famous-level accomplishments, but it’s important to recognize that the big stuff is dependent on the little stuff. If everyone wanted to be Elon Musk, who would be left to teach our children or nurse the sick? But if we all align our tasks with a broader vision of mutual evolution and wellness while consistently dedicating ourselves to the “small” but virtuous ingredients mentioned above, this will change the world a whole lot faster.
Use the Dreambook to help contextualize your work and interests within the bigger picture of who you want to be and what kind of world you want to live in, and then use the book and the Dragontree online community to help you stay on track. We’re here for you!
Be well,
Peter
[post_title] => The Main Ingredients in a High Level Quality of Life
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Last week I wrote about the theory of homeopathy. Homeopathy is the practice of prescribing specially prepared homeopathic remedies made from extremely dilute natural substances. In many cases, a remedy is used to treat the symptoms that a larger dose of the same substance would cause. For instance, chopping onions may cause redness, burning and tearing of the eyes, and a runny nose. A homeopathic preparation of onion (Allium cepa) is used to treat these conditions, such as when they occur due to a cold or allergies.
Today I want to clarify some points and explore homeopathy’s conundrum. First, since people sometimes confuse the terms, homeopathic is different than holistic, which refers to any treatment that aims to consider and support the whole individual. Acupuncture and naturopathic medicine are examples of holistic systems, though most acupuncturists don’t practice homeopathy, and homeopathy is usually a relatively small fraction of what most naturopathic physicians do.
Second, most of the scientific community believes homeopathy is pseudoscience and no more effective than a placebo. Indeed, there are numerous studies that invalidate homeopathy. Advocates of homeopathy point out that the unfavorable studies involve giving subjects a homeopathic remedy matched to a particular symptom or medical condition without utilizing the specificity that’s essential in effective homeopathic diagnosis. Homeopaths contend that when a remedy is matched not only to the dominant symptoms, but the whole picture of the individual, the rate of success is much higher.
As I said in the last article, I’ve witnessed many cases in which homeopathy did nothing useful – though at least it was entirely harmless and without side effects – and I have also witnessed cases in which it was remarkably effective. Could it have been a placebo effect? Sure. But if it was “merely” a placebo effect, it was a profound placebo effect: a perfect medicine that was entirely beneficial, painless to administer, palatable, with zero downside. One should be asking, “How can we reproduce this?”
Homeopathy is vastly popular around the world. Its use is especially prevalent in France, Italy, India, Switzerland, Mexico, Germany, England, and the U.S. 29% of the EU population uses homeopathy on a daily basis. About half of Germans have used homeopathic medicines and about 70% say they are satisfied with its effects.1 History shows us that sheer number of adherents doesn’t make something correct or morally right, but we’re smarter than ever and have more options.
So, what’s going on here? Why do so many people use it if it’s a sham? Well, there are two possibilities. 1) The thousands of practitioners and roughly 200 million people who use homeopathy on a regular basis are fooling themselves. They think homeopathy is useful but it’s just a placebo and/or wishful thinking. Or 2) There is actual benefit to homeopathy which can’t be substantiated by current science and is not accurately reflected by the research.
Trust me, as a scientist, it’s hard to understand its validity, but I also know what I’ve seen. Are there other systems of medicine with higher rates of success? Probably. To be frank, it is not my go-to modality except for a small number of conditions for which I consistently get good results with homeopathic remedies. However, I’m a mediocre homeopath and I have more training and skill in other forms of medicine.
But when it works, it works. And I have seen cases where several medicines were tried but only the homeopathic one succeeded, including numerous instances in which the patient was highly skeptical of homeopathy. If it were a placebo effect, why would the other medicines not have produced a benefit equal to that of homeopathy? Why would a skeptical patient have a placebo effect when the basis for a placebo response is an expectation of benefit? Should science have the ability to invalidate someone’s subjective experience of benefit?
I don’t have the answers to these questions. I know some incredibly intelligent doctors who practice homeopathy, and I have seen it and them derided by the medical mainstream. Skeptics’ concern, they say, is that people might not get effective medical help because they’re using homeopathics instead. I agree that if someone isn’t getting a benefit from a chosen medical modality, it might be useful to consider other options. I also believe it’s everyone’s right to manage their health in whatever way they wish – even if it hastens their demise. For perspective, it’s important to note that, according to a recent Johns Hopkins study, 250,000 Americans die each year due to medical errors, making mainstream medicine the third leading cause of death after heart disease and cancer. I have seen people killed by mainstream medical treatments. A modality’s safety is no small thing.
While there are plenty of people who are averse to biomedicine, we tend to treat the mainstream with a greater degree of respect than is extended to alternative fields. For instance, when we hear that a particular drug or procedure doesn’t work, most people conclude that this particular intervention wasn’t effective. We don’t say, “Well, biomedicine doesn’t work.” In contrast, when an alternative medicine fails to benefit a certain condition, a common conclusion is that the entire modality is worthless. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen an author cite a single failed acupuncture study as proof that acupuncture is bunk. It’s an unfortunate reflection of the tendency for the mainstream to squash its rivals, even when they don’t truly threaten it.
It's important, therefore, that we all keep our eyes wide open and practice critical thinking (and not just when it comes to medicine). Be your own advocate, trust your intuition, listen to your body, and don’t assume that just because someone has a degree they know what’s right for you.
Be well,
Dr. Peter Borten
- https://www.hri-research.org/resources/essentialevidence/use-of-homeopathy-across-the-world/ ; https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Regulation_and_prevalence_of_homeopathy ; https://homeopathyeurope.org/
[post_title] => Are We Fooling Ourselves When We Believe in Alternative Medicine?
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As a young adult living in Western Massachusetts, I had a handful of friends who attended Hampshire College. Hampshire is well known for being highly unconventional. There are no majors, no departments, and no grades. So much of the program is up to the student, including a final yearlong project. I could see why it was appealing, especially to people who didn’t seem to fit into typical academic institutions.
When I first heard these friends talk of the wonderfully freeform nature of their college experience, I was envious. In later years, as they found it increasingly challenging to keep themselves on course, I remember saying, “That kind of program wouldn’t work for me.” I realized, with no shame at all, that I needed way (way) more hand-holding. Only one of my Hampshire friends graduated. I guess they needed more hand-holding too.
There are a number of reasons we avoid getting help or taking direction:
- We’re too proud to admit we need help.
- We’re afraid of opening up, being vulnerable, or appearing weak.
- We think nobody is capable of helping us.
- We don’t want to be controlled or guided in a way we don’t like.
- We don’t want to be told what to do.
- We don’t want to be a burden.
- We don’t want to share the credit.
- We feel it’s less of an accomplishment if we get help.
- We believe we need to do things all by ourselves.
This last one is a common inherited belief, though nearly every impressive historical figure had a team of supporters. Yes, there’s a grain of truth to it: each of us is responsible for ourselves, our choices and actions. Each of us is responsible for how we show up in the world. Nobody can do the internal work for us. But it’s perfectly okay to get tons of help along the way. It doesn’t diminish the outcome. In fact, we connect and improve through the process when we let others in. This is true even when it comes to healing and spirituality. It’s time to let go of the “Lone Ranger complex.”
Guidance and mutual support are an important part of why our program, Sacred Expansion, has been so successful. We created Sacred Expansion as a prerequisite for our life coaching trainees, as we feel it’s important to “clean house” before guiding others. It was designed to help people get to know themselves more deeply, release old unhealthy patterns, and open to a state of greater intuition and trust – all within a group of others on the same journey.
It turned out to be so monumental for our early participants that we decided to make Sacred Expansion available as a stand-alone course. Enrollment is happening NOW! You’ll be lovingly led by my wife, Briana, through an exploration of yourself through the metaphors of the seasons. And you’ll come out of it with greater clarity and self-awareness, less baggage, a deeper connection to Spirit, and the tools to continue the process on your own. I encourage you to do it!
Also, I recommend you look back at that list of reasons we avoid getting help and see if there are any that ring a bell for you. If so, consider the following questions. Is this belief true? (E.g., Is it true that nobody could help me? Is it true that if I asked for help, it would compromise me in some critical way? Is it true that it’s less of an accomplishment if I get help?) And then meditate on what life might be like if you felt completely at ease and unembarrassed about asking for help and graciously receiving it?
Be well,
Peter
P.S. Early Bird pricing for Sacred Expansion is currently in progress. Sign up today and save $200! On August 17th, the price goes up, so if you want to join us, don't miss this opportunity!
Click here to enroll today!
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