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While I wouldn’t wish pain on anyone, I don’t always think it’s best to make it go away as fast as possible. Sometimes the need to manage pain takes us inward, prompting us to understand our workings and to heal longstanding patterns that might otherwise have never been discovered.
My starting point in pain management is a fundamental principle of Chinese Medicine: All pain is caused by stagnation. When things move freely (muscles, joints, blood, poop, etc.), we feel good. When they don’t, we feel bad.
If we overeat and food is stagnant in our digestive tract, we feel uncomfortable. If blood stops moving through the vessels in our heart, it causes a crushing pain. If our muscles are inflamed or tight (stagnation), they hurt. In the same way, if we broke up with someone but we keep fantasizing about them or replaying our conversations, this also is a form of stagnation, and it’s painful. If we’re attached to life being a certain way, it’s not that way, we don’t accept it, and we feel bad… guess why.
So, the restoration of flow is my focus, no matter what kind of pain a person is in. Besides understanding the mechanism of stagnation in causing and perpetuating pain, it’s important for everyone to know these four sub-principles:
1: All of our many parts are interconnected, so stagnation on one level can readily lead to stagnation on another level. Two examples: If we’re chronically angry, tense, or sad (emotional stagnation) this can eventually show up as, say, a tension headache or lower back pain (physical stagnation). Vice versa, living in a tight and inflexible body (physical stagnation) can contribute to a lack of mental flexibility - rigid thinking, frustration, depression, etc.
2: Clearing stagnation on any level tends to promote flow on all levels. For instance, physical exercise is beneficial for depression, because moving the body moves the mind. Likewise, using the mind to imagine energy and blood coursing freely through a painful area of the body can often be as effective as painkillers. For this reason, stretching the mind – challenging our beliefs, thinking outside our usual patterns, meditating, actively exploring our inner terrain – is excellent for mind-body health.
3: Resisting reality promotes stagnation. Philip K. Dick said, “Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.” Fighting reality amounts to inner resistance and resistance causes stagnation. In my opinion, it’s one of the most basic mechanisms of human pathology: an inner “no” that causes us to close and fragment ourselves. Resistance of what’s happening (not just our circumstances but also our own thoughts and feelings) causes an additional dimension of discomfort and hampers our ability to change our condition. In a pain scenario, the resistance of an already stagnant condition inevitably makes it worse.
4: Active acceptance is the opposite of resistance and promotes healing. Acceptance is a combination of willingness, openness, and nonattachment. When we’re totally willing to experience the reality of this moment, with every aspect of ourselves, with absolute openness and trust, simultaneously letting go entirely of any desire to control what happens next, healing happens automatically. It may not look like a tumor instantly disappearing or pain dropping from a ten to a zero, but something will change. This isn’t a do-it-once magic formula, it’s a way of life. And if pain is what leads you to it, you may end up thanking your pain.
If these ideas resonate with you, check out my online course, Live Pain Free, for many more ways to get out of pain and experience greater peace and happiness in the process.
Be well,
Peter
[post_title] => What Everyone Should Know About Pain
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[post_date] => 2022-12-09 19:07:09
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What makes a town or city appealing to you? The architecture? The landscape? The climate? The people? The cuisine? I love traveling and I’ve given a lot of thought to why some places feel so attractive to me and others don’t. My favorite towns have all these ingredients plus another: they’re full of small businesses.
Strolling the winding streets of Madrid, Pearl Street in Boulder, Hawthorne in Portland, Le Plateau in Montreal, and the downtowns of virtually all cool cities and towns, you’ll pass locally owned flower shops, unique restaurants, art galleries, and, of course, spas like The Dragontree. 😉
You could blindfold me and teleport me to downtown Missoula, Northampton, San Francisco, Marblehead, or Port Townsend. I’d know immediately where I was (and I’d ask to stay for a while). Drop me in a sea of Target, Walmart, Starbucks, Best Buy and giant parking lots, and I could be anywhere (but nowhere I’d want to live). Any sense of home or connection is greatly diminished when a region’s commerce is dominated by giant chains.
Small businesses make towns special. They give a community character and make the patron feel connected to the proprietor. They’re also important avenues for other small businesses – like artists, hair stylists, bakers – to do their craft and get compensated well for it.
So if you want to help preserve the specialness of a place, if you want your downtown to stay cool and vibrant, patronize its small businesses! Let’s all make a deal to do all our holiday shopping at small businesses this year! It’s a gift not just to the recipient but also to the small business owner and employees and the community it resides in.
Be well,
Peter
[post_title] => Think Small This Holiday Season
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I had been hearing about an impressive tai chi teacher named Gregory Fong since moving to Portland in 1997. It was about five years later that I convinced Briana to join me one evening and we drove to Chinatown to check out his class. Sifu (“master”) Fong, as everyone called him, was probably not more than about five feet tall, but there was something intimidating about him. He welcomed us warmly, then said, “I have two questions for you. First, do you like pain?”
Do I like pain? What is the appropriate answer here? I mumbled something like, “Maybe if there is a good reason.”
He smiled. “Question two. Do you like to work hard?”
Oh boy. I thought about asking him to define the word “like,” but instead responded with, “I guess?”
He chuckled. “Alright, you don’t know if you like pain or hard work. Just sit down on that chair then.” He pointed to a wooden folding chair against a wall covered with framed portraits of Chinese men. “Rest your hands on your thighs. Don’t lean back. Lift your feet off the floor just high enough for one sheet of paper to fit under them. See you later.” And he walked away for a long time. You can try that right now if you’re sitting.
Years later, having done a lot of hard work and endured much pain in his classes, I reflected that I did in fact like to work hard. I still didn’t like pain, but I had learned the difference between avoiding it versus using it and finding a way through it. And I decided that those two questions are useful preliminaries before almost any endeavor.
They came to mind as I was thinking about the upcoming launch of our Sacred Expansion course. It’s a required program for all of our life coaches, and worthwhile for anyone interested in growing beyond their self-imposed limitations and releasing blocks to having an exceptional life.
In the context of Sacred Expansion, if I were to ask, “Do you like pain?” what I mean is, are you willing to voluntarily experience discomfort as part of discovering what’s holding you back? Are you willing to experience the tension of psycho-spiritual growing pains? Are you willing to be uncomfortable in the short term in order to release the long term discomfort you’ve gotten used to? Are you willing to use your pain to initiate a breakthrough?
As for the question “Do you like to work hard?” what I mean is, are you willing to stick with the work of unraveling your inner knots even when it’s difficult? Are you willing to choose a higher purpose – for instance: freedom, peace, spiritual connection, joy, service to your species and planet – over and over and over? Are you willing to break some habits? Are you willing to challenge your own thoughts? Are you willing to explore parts of yourself you aren’t comfortable with? All of these tasks represent a certain form of work.
By liking hard work, I don’t mean that you get points for having a hard life or that there’s merit in making things unnecessarily difficult. In fact, a core principle Sifu taught was that hard work and peace aren’t mutually exclusive. We can be at ease while simultaneously working our hardest. Regardless of the form that our work takes, there’s no getting around the importance of consistent effort in the direction of our dreams if we want them to come to fruition.
If you’ve even thought, “I know I have greater potential than this” or, “I feel like I’m missing out on my superpowers” or, “If I could release all this baggage, I could finally feel free!” read more about Sacred Expansion. We’d love to have you join us.
Be well,
Peter
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While I wouldn’t wish pain on anyone, I don’t always think it’s best to make it go away as fast as possible. Sometimes the need to manage pain takes us inward, prompting us to understand our workings and to heal longstanding patterns that might otherwise have never been discovered.
My starting point in pain management is a fundamental principle of Chinese Medicine: All pain is caused by stagnation. When things move freely (muscles, joints, blood, poop, etc.), we feel good. When they don’t, we feel bad.
If we overeat and food is stagnant in our digestive tract, we feel uncomfortable. If blood stops moving through the vessels in our heart, it causes a crushing pain. If our muscles are inflamed or tight (stagnation), they hurt. In the same way, if we broke up with someone but we keep fantasizing about them or replaying our conversations, this also is a form of stagnation, and it’s painful. If we’re attached to life being a certain way, it’s not that way, we don’t accept it, and we feel bad… guess why.
So, the restoration of flow is my focus, no matter what kind of pain a person is in. Besides understanding the mechanism of stagnation in causing and perpetuating pain, it’s important for everyone to know these four sub-principles:
1: All of our many parts are interconnected, so stagnation on one level can readily lead to stagnation on another level. Two examples: If we’re chronically angry, tense, or sad (emotional stagnation) this can eventually show up as, say, a tension headache or lower back pain (physical stagnation). Vice versa, living in a tight and inflexible body (physical stagnation) can contribute to a lack of mental flexibility - rigid thinking, frustration, depression, etc.
2: Clearing stagnation on any level tends to promote flow on all levels. For instance, physical exercise is beneficial for depression, because moving the body moves the mind. Likewise, using the mind to imagine energy and blood coursing freely through a painful area of the body can often be as effective as painkillers. For this reason, stretching the mind – challenging our beliefs, thinking outside our usual patterns, meditating, actively exploring our inner terrain – is excellent for mind-body health.
3: Resisting reality promotes stagnation. Philip K. Dick said, “Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.” Fighting reality amounts to inner resistance and resistance causes stagnation. In my opinion, it’s one of the most basic mechanisms of human pathology: an inner “no” that causes us to close and fragment ourselves. Resistance of what’s happening (not just our circumstances but also our own thoughts and feelings) causes an additional dimension of discomfort and hampers our ability to change our condition. In a pain scenario, the resistance of an already stagnant condition inevitably makes it worse.
4: Active acceptance is the opposite of resistance and promotes healing. Acceptance is a combination of willingness, openness, and nonattachment. When we’re totally willing to experience the reality of this moment, with every aspect of ourselves, with absolute openness and trust, simultaneously letting go entirely of any desire to control what happens next, healing happens automatically. It may not look like a tumor instantly disappearing or pain dropping from a ten to a zero, but something will change. This isn’t a do-it-once magic formula, it’s a way of life. And if pain is what leads you to it, you may end up thanking your pain.
If these ideas resonate with you, check out my online course, Live Pain Free, for many more ways to get out of pain and experience greater peace and happiness in the process.
Be well,
Peter
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