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“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
I don't actively listen to the radio, but when my ipod dies I'll turn it on in my car. Maybe I'm older now, but I don't get it. The majority of the really popular stuff really offends me with its lack of substance, over-sexualizing of everything, trite messages, and cookie cutter sound.
This is top 40 radio, so the numbers of people in a younger age range that hear this stuff is HUGE! Why is it that when a female singer decides that they want to "grow up" and change their image it automatically relates to hardly wearing any clothes? Of course, the result seems to be so many girls that seem to be too young running around in very little clothing. We can assume that it wasn't really their decision to make, but more of a dictation by popular culture.
I've read about performers such as Rhianna claiming that they empower women while the stills from her latest videos seem to have her wearing only prosthetic lizard skin over her breasts. Where is the power in that? Where is the power in singing music that someone else has written and fitting into a cookie cutter overblown version of sexuality that seems to have been created?
I like to think of myself as open minded. Maybe I'm wrong, but I don't see strength and the definition of adulthood in these things. I see no personality. I see no control of oneself. As one who has long been involved in the music industry, I know that there are executives making these decisions to package these people in a very precise way...and it is so disheartening.
Pick up a guitar. Put pen to paper. Dress how you want, but do it with a CONVICTION that is YOU and not what you think you are supposed to be. Be intelligent. Speak your mind. Own your body. Do with it what rings true to yourself and not what peers or a particularly broken industry tells you to.
-Meredith DeLoca (Assistant Spa Director - The Dragontree PDX)
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I believe we need about 364 more celebrations of Thanksgiving in a year, and not because we need more reasons to overeat and watch football. Giving thanks is good for us. Need some proven reasons? Here they are.
- It makes you happier. Numerous studies have shown that expressing gratitude, journaling about what we're grateful for, and paying attention to the good things in our lives makes us feel more happy.
- It improves your relationships. Being aware of what we’re thankful for makes us more helpful and understanding. People who express gratitude for their partner feel more positively about that person. They also tend to feel more comfortable about expressing relationship concerns (so they can get worked out!).
- It increases your self-esteem. A practice of feeling appreciative for our live circumstances tends to make us feel better about ourselves.
- It reduces depression and anxiety. Simply taking the time to write about what they were grateful for resulted in lower rates of depression and anxiety in study participants – even 12 weeks later.
- It enhances brain function. Gratitude exercises have been shown to cause a lasting activation of a part of the brain called the medial prefrontal cortex, associated with higher thought and increased sensitivity.
- It makes you appear more trustworthy to others. When someone regularly expresses gratitude, others interpret this to indicate they are trustworthy and this strengthens social connections.
- It makes you more resilient. When we focus on what we’re thankful for, even during times of hardship, it reinforces feelings of self-trust and helps us to remember the blessings that can’t be lost or taken away.
- It expands the spiritual dimension of your life. Gratitude practices tend to strengthen our spiritual connection, probably because they prompt us to listen, look, and feel more deeply. They may attune us to a benevolent higher power that’s looking out for us, give us perspective of the path we’re on, and help us to see the goodness in what seems unfortunate on the surface.
- It makes you more generous. When we routinely express gratitude, we’re less self-centered and more giving.
- It lowers blood pressure, enhances your sleep, increases your likelihood of exercising, and improves overall health. Don’t put all your eggs in this basket, but regular expressions of gratitude support modest physical health gains.
- It diminishes the weight of your burdens. Focusing on what we appreciate has the simultaneous effect of lessening the intensity of whatever we’re struggling with.
Besides whatever special gains a gratitude practice may have, I feel there’s one main reason to do it, and that’s because life is a gift and each of us has the power to choose how we relate to it. Expressing gratitude is an act of cutting through the illusions that tell us otherwise. It’s about fiercely claiming this truth. It’s about claiming your light and shining it brightly.
Among many other things, I am grateful for all of you who have supported us. I’m grateful to have this forum to explore topics of depth in health, nature, and spirituality. And I’m grateful to be able to do my work in this way and have a positive impact on others’ lives.
Be well,
Peter
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This article was original published one year ago, and it's one of our all-time favorites about summer and the fire element. Enjoy, and Happy Solstice!
A few days ago I was out in the sun in a beekeeping suit for hours, lifting frames of comb that were heavy and dripping with honey. We had to damage the bees’ work because they had “cross-combed” some of their frames together (built comb that bridged multiple “drawers” of their hive), so they were buzzing around us angrily and dive-bombing my face. It was getting very toasty in my suit, and then I started feeling my heartbeat in my head. I turned to Briana and I said, “I think I might pass out.”
I remembered a cooling technique one of my first yoga teachers taught me: you curl your tongue and inhale slowly through it like a straw, then exhale through your nose, and repeat. I don’t know if that’s what did it or if it was the Great Bee Spirit yelling into my mind, “Get it together, man! Do NOT drop that box full of thousands of bees!” I am happy to report that I didn’t faint and we finished our work without incident.
That convergence of tremendous heat and the beating of my heart reminded me that it’s a good time to revisit the lessons of the Fire Element. Fire presides over summer, when the Sun – the quintessence of Fire – is closest to us. In the human body, each element is represented by an internal organ. Can you guess what the main Fire organ is?
I’ll give you a hint. It’s red, it’s constantly pulsating, and it radiates its influence over the whole body. It’s the heart, of course – the sun of the human being. Over the past couple centuries, the brain has largely displaced the heart as the organ people think of as most important – but it would be worthless without constant, uninterrupted blood flow from the heart.
In traditional Chinese medical philosophy, each organ has a position in the community of the body-mind, and the heart is considered to be the Emperor/Empress. The ancient Daoists had a lot of wise things to say about leadership (see the classic, Dao De Jing by Lao Zi), and I think these insights are especially valuable at this time – particularly in the U.S. where recent years have brought intense sociopolitical division.
The role of the superior leader, Lao Zi wrote, is to integrate, to allow all parts of the kingdom to feel included. Before the throne of the superior leader, everyone is heard; no one is stifled or invalidated. As the Fire organ, we could say it’s like allowing the light and warmth of the sun to spread to and encompass the farthest reaches of the solar system. Even a planet as distant as Pluto is still held in the Sun’s grasp.
The role of the heart as an organ is the same – it wants to circulate its blood to all parts of the body. If there’s something sick or objectionable, like a sore on the foot, it doesn’t exclude the foot from its circulation. While that might kill the foot and eliminate the sore, it wouldn’t be real healing.
The heart is considered to be the portal by which Awareness (Shen) enters this body and mind. I consider the term Awareness here to be synonymous with Light of Consciousness, Holy Spirit, God, Love, or whatever word feels best to you. Let’s use Love for the moment, since it doesn’t push as many buttons as “God” and it shares a lot of qualities with Fire.
Until about 100 years ago, Fire (as the sun, campfires, candles, etc.) was the sole source of light and warmth in our world. When we open our hearts to Love, we feel a similar inner light and warmth. Love could be considered the heart’s greatest power. Love, like Fire, is a unifying force. People of all kinds and in all places look up to the same one light and are sustained by it. And though all manner of things can be fed into a fire, they become one homogeneous pile of ash – all differences rendered indistinguishable. The same is the case for Love.
The heart works best when it’s open. An open heart lets love and awareness through. An open heart is inclusive. But we’ve all closed our hearts many times. We do it as a reactive defense mechanism in order to not feel pain or other undesirable feelings. We do it whenever we refuse to accept some aspect of reality (like white supremacists or human trafficking, to name two of the hardest). Sometimes we believe it’s best not to feel at all – because that will make life easier or will make us strong and manly. So the heart remains mostly or entirely closed. Is it any wonder that the main cause of death is, essentially, closure of the heart and its vessels (we call this stroke, heart attack, and other forms of cardiovascular disease)?
The physical implications of closed hearts are relatively minor, though. The psychospiritual implications are where this habit hits us hardest. What are we left with when we exclude Love, Light, and Spirit from our lives? It’s like restricting ourselves to seeing just one color (it’s called Pantone 448 C, by the way). It makes us think of the world in terms of “us and them.” It causes us to focus on what’s wrong instead of what’s right. And it enables us to be willfully ignorant (but not entirely ignorant) of the impacts of our choices on other humans and the planet.
I believe the work of the heart (through the power of love) is absolute inclusion. Feel everything. Accept everything – even the things you’re working to change. Accept everyone – even those you condemn (they have something to teach you about your shadow). This is not an invitation to bypass the work before you. It’s a call to step into that work with an open heart.
If there’s something you don’t like about the world, or a person you find difficult, consider the likely outcome of rejecting or excluding them. How would you respond to being condemned? Like the sick foot, does this person heal through exclusion?
Find the parts of your kingdom (within and without) that you have excluded, and let your love rush into them. If there’s something you don’t like, begin with inclusion. Say, “I completely love, forgive, and accept myself – even though I have this {issue that I find objectionable}” or “I completely love, forgive, and accept you – even though I disagree with your views {or even condemn your actions}.” You may even find your heart saying, “Even though I must stop you from harming others, I completely love, forgive, and accept the essential being that you are, and I welcome the healing of your mind and the re-emergence of that essence.”
Saturate and envelop, and draw into your heart, the orphaned and rejected elements of yourself and the world. I believe this is our soul work; this is how we heal the world.
Be well,
Dr. Peter Borten
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“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
I don't actively listen to the radio, but when my ipod dies I'll turn it on in my car. Maybe I'm older now, but I don't get it. The majority of the really popular stuff really offends me with its lack of substance, over-sexualizing of everything, trite messages, and cookie cutter sound.
This is top 40 radio, so the numbers of people in a younger age range that hear this stuff is HUGE! Why is it that when a female singer decides that they want to "grow up" and change their image it automatically relates to hardly wearing any clothes? Of course, the result seems to be so many girls that seem to be too young running around in very little clothing. We can assume that it wasn't really their decision to make, but more of a dictation by popular culture.
I've read about performers such as Rhianna claiming that they empower women while the stills from her latest videos seem to have her wearing only prosthetic lizard skin over her breasts. Where is the power in that? Where is the power in singing music that someone else has written and fitting into a cookie cutter overblown version of sexuality that seems to have been created?
I like to think of myself as open minded. Maybe I'm wrong, but I don't see strength and the definition of adulthood in these things. I see no personality. I see no control of oneself. As one who has long been involved in the music industry, I know that there are executives making these decisions to package these people in a very precise way...and it is so disheartening.
Pick up a guitar. Put pen to paper. Dress how you want, but do it with a CONVICTION that is YOU and not what you think you are supposed to be. Be intelligent. Speak your mind. Own your body. Do with it what rings true to yourself and not what peers or a particularly broken industry tells you to.
-Meredith DeLoca (Assistant Spa Director - The Dragontree PDX)
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