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While some cultures have longstanding traditions to celebrate their mothers, ours didn’t begin until about 1911 when all the states adopted Mother’s Day. It was the culmination of a campaign begun in 1905 by Anna Jarvis in honor of her late mother, Anne Reeves Jarvis, who had worked for peace and tended to wounded soldiers from both sides during the Civil War.
In 1914, Woodrow Wilson made Mother’s Day a national holiday, and within a decade companies were capitalizing on it with cards, chocolate, and bouquets. Jarvis didn’t like it. She was so opposed to the commercialization of Mother’s Day that she organized boycotts against it and was once arrested for disturbing the peace when she freaked out about people selling white carnations – her mother’s favorite flower – for the holiday. When she discovered that a restaurant was selling a “Mother’s Day Salad,” she ordered one and dumped it on the floor. Jarvis felt that no mother would prefer a gift over a visit or heartfelt letter. (However, had she known about massages and skin care at The Dragontree, she would have undoubtedly been in support of getting these services for your mom.) ;)
In honor of Jarvis and the original spirit of the holiday I’d like to talk about mothers and what they mean to us. I’m lucky to have a good relationship with my mom, but I know it’s complicated for many people. Mothers almost never have any training in mothering. There aren’t any prerequisites for bearing children. You don’t need to have healed your psychological wounds. You don’t need to understand kids, nutrition, scheduling, or housekeeping. You don’t have to be sober, you don’t need self-esteem, you don’t need to be in a safe relationship, and don’t need communication skills. If your mother had most of these managed, perhaps you’re luckier than you think.
I was talking with a patient last week about her strained relationship with her mother and she said something to the effect of, “I know I should just stop expecting her to be different than she is, because she’s not going to change.” I’ve heard this statement a lot about parents, and I think it’s worth exploring.
It’s so common to want your mom to be different – to be supportive, to listen to you, to accept your choices, to love you unconditionally. Is this unreasonable? Of course not. These are the qualities of the archetypal Mother and they’re what everyone wants.
(Aside: If your mama embodies these qualities, take a moment for gratitude. Also, even if your mother is no longer living, you may still struggle with the history of your relationship, and healing is still possible.)
As for whether the person who gave birth to you is capable of embodying these qualities, that’s another story. She’s a human with her own weaknesses, wounds, and baggage. Maybe she never had these qualities modeled by her own mother. Maybe she’s too wrapped up in her own inner turmoil to be able to extend this kind of presence to her children. If your mother has failed to embody these qualities, you have two main options. Option one is blame and resentment. Option two is to see her and forgive her.
Maybe you’re thinking, “Wait. This is about getting my mother to be a better mother to me and it sounds like you’re directing me to help her.”
True. While we grow up thinking of the parent-child relationship as a mostly one-way street, it’s not. I believe it’s possible that you and your mom were brought together because of the potential for you to help her. And that can occur through your choosing to hold space for whomever she really is.
You’ll have to let go, at least momentarily, of any beliefs about who she should be and how your relationship should be. Open the space in your consciousness to allow for this whole woman. If you feel resistance in your body, welcome the sensation and let it pass through you. Breathe deeply. Keep your heart open. Hold her in your awareness without judgement. Forgive her – for everything. When you feel a sense of peace or resolution, I suggest you journal about it.
What if she was absolutely rotten to you? Well, I’m not suggesting you must be in an active relationship with her, nor that you even have to like her. What I want for you and your mother (and everyone) is freedom. The freedom to be however you are, and the freedom for her to be however she is. This doesn’t mean you can’t communicate requests that she treat you differently, but it does mean that she gets to decide if and how she honors those requests.
You’ll have an easier time allowing greater freedom into this relationship when you broaden your concept of what mothering means and where it comes from. While your mother gave you a body and fed you for many years, she may or may not have consciously guided you through the transition out of needing her, and this is important. If she didn’t help you in this regard, forgive her. She may not have known to do this; she may not have known how; and she may have felt incapable of supporting you to become less dependent on her because it felt like losing you. But that’s what the healthy mothering arc looks like – a transition from direct mothering to indirect mothering, and from dependence on her to independence and the ability to recognize your own needs and find ways to get them met.
I was only slightly kidding about Dragontree massages at the beginning of this article. Receiving compassionate touch is one of the many ways we connect with that mothered feeling of being held, understood, and nurtured. Some other ways include:
- Feeding ourselves well or allowing ourselves to be fed
- Connecting with the earth, feeling the soil and the rhythm of the planet
- Bathing ourselves lovingly (or, again, allowing ourselves to be bathed)
- Being listened to by a good friend and accepting their care
- Singing – to ourselves and others – and being sung to
I have a homework assignment for you. Try one of these (or another way in which you are nourished in this same way) this week and really focus on receiving it. When you know the ways in which you register motherly love and you let yourself receive it, you’ll notice that there’s less pressure on your biological mother to provide this for you. More freedom for you, more freedom for her.
Be well,
Peter
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There’s a well-known spiritual quote from philosopher and teacher Jiddhu Krishnamurti. The story goes that he was speaking to a group of students (who saw him as an enlightened master), and he whispered, “Do you want to know my secret?” At this, the room fell silent and everyone leaned forward. Then he continued, “I don’t mind what happens.”
What I like about this idea is that it’s simple; it speaks of a state of transcendence of the ego and unshakable peace. But as an expression of absolute spiritual truth, it also lends itself to spiritual bypassing and illusions about spirituality.
The tricky thing about Krishnamurti’s statement is that he was presumably speaking not from his ego but from an expanded state of consciousness, his higher Self. Thus, while not minding what happens was his outlook from this state, it’s not necessarily the path that got him there.
In Krishnamurti’s case, he went through a series of spontaneous, often painful experiences over many years that caused an opening of his consciousness. That’s not something we can replicate at will. So what can we garner from this “secret”?
It’s a good opening to a discussion on how we relate to absolute spiritual truths while existing in a world of relativity. Even among non-dual spiritual traditions (meaning, all the world is considered to be an expression of one great Being, and separation is an illusion), there is often a distinction made between the Source in an absolute sense (which is formless) and the many forms it takes in the relative world.
In the realm of the relative, which is where the majority of human minds dwell, relativity directs nearly every aspect of our lives. For instance, when we say something is good, we’re usually not coming from the experience that the universe is fundamentally Good, and therefore all of its expressions are imbued with that same essence of goodness. What we mean is that things are good relative to some other way they could be. Thus, we’re directed toward things that we perceive as better than our other options and away from things that seem worse. And absolute spiritual truths – like “the universe is fundamentally good” – are simply lofty concepts to most people. We do get glimpses of them though (as I’ve written about in my articles on “gaps” in the dominant egocentric state), and these often fuel a drive for spiritual awakening.
People who have gone through a certain form of spiritual awakening (what’s sometimes referred to as enlightenment, liberation, or moksha) often describe it as an experience of becoming perpetually conscious of the absolute. This doesn’t make the relative disappear, but the awareness of the undying oneness that unifies all apparent differences enables them to play in relativity without the “high stakes” feeling – and the anxiousness and drama that go with it – that most humans experience. This is why it’s referred to as liberation, which can be a very appealing notion to anyone who wants to be happy.
So, apparently from this state, Krishnamurti said, “I don’t mind what happens” because, in an absolute sense, nothing is ever wrong. Nor is there such a thing as tragedy or victory. To win a race just means one part of the Source crossed the finish line before another part of the same Source (or God beat God, if you prefer that name). Likewise, the death of any given expression of the Source is akin to a red blood cell dying and being recycled into a new blood cell; the Whole has lost nothing in the process.
It's important to recognize that an absolute spiritual truth is different from an uplifting life principle or a good piece of advice. If someone told you their “secret” is “Focus on the good” or “Don’t sweat the small stuff” or “Practice gratitude” or “Don’t take anything personally” you could immediately adopt it and start living it. But to a person who hasn’t realized and directly experienced it, an absolute truth isn’t actionable in the same way. And in relative terms, the absolute may make no sense at all.
Imagine that a dog is biting your leg and you think to yourself, “I’m going to be spiritual about this. What did Krishnamurti say? Oh yeah, I don’t mind what happens. I guess I’d better breathe through this. Whew, that’s a lot of blood. Do I just let him keep gnawing? I don’t mind. I don’t mind. I don’t mind. If I call 9-1-1, does that constitute “minding”?” I doubt many people would take an unrealized spiritual truth to this extent, but as you can imagine, it’s possible to get into some trouble this way.
Next week we’ll try to find the usefulness in statements of absolute truth and we’ll talk about what to do if you do mind what happens. Meanwhile, I always love to hear what readers think of these philosophical explorations.
Be well,
Peter
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Later this week Briana and I will be hosting the Illuminator Training – part of Dragontree Life Coaching Program – and we’ll spend four days in a very special space. It’s going to be at our house, and while I think our house is a special physical space, the space I’m talking about here is something different. I really mean that we’ll be in a special state of consciousness – one in which people feel safe to really see themselves and others, to be in loving community, to learn and heal.
I am both proud and humbled to co-create such a space. When I write or talk about it, it’s hard not to feel I’m exaggerating; so much positive change occurs in such a short time. For me, it reinforces the value of what we teach in the course – primarily the value of holding space.
The first handful of times I heard the term “hold space” I regarded it as New Age jargon and didn’t give it serious consideration. Once I was 20-something at a big dance event and the movie Baraka was being projected onto the walls. Amidst beautiful, sometimes haunting imagery, we were taken to an egg factory. There were conveyor belts and metal chutes along which were tumbling thousands and thousands of fuzzy yellow chicks. Attendants casually pulled them out by a wing and then tossed half of them (the males) down a giant funnel (into a grinder). The remainder were de-beaked, and in the next scene they were sickly and missing feathers, crammed into stacks upon stacks of wire cages.
There was a sudden collective moan of sorrow through the crowd. Someone shouted, “Breathe! Hold space for them!” And I thought, “What does that even mean?”
Well, now I know what it means and I think it was good advice – not just to hold space for the chicks, but to hold space for everyone involved. I also think that the term “hold space” is perfect for describing this practice. It’s an art, really. It comes naturally to some people but not most, and many gifted healers, teachers, and guides are skilled at it even if they’ve never heard the term.
Holding space has a few meanings for me. First, it means to become a neutral, benevolent container for what’s happening. That is, hold this moment in your awareness – ideally until some resolution or balance has developed. This entails giving your attention to what’s happening right here, right now and supporting its natural unfoldment.
When we’re holding space, we’re not trying to diagnose, fix anything, or come up with the answer. We’re not trying to be impressive or spiritual, and we’re not hoping to get approval. And we’re not departing from the task at hand to meander into the forest of our own thoughts.
Second, holding space means focusing on and protecting the space itself – maintaining an opening. By space here, I mean the formless consciousness that is the Universe – the matrix from which all objects (things, feelings, ideas) arise. You could also call it God or Undifferentiated Awareness or Spirit. It’s the bulk of the iceberg of reality, while the stuff that tends to get 99.9% of our attention is the very tip. Because space is more ethereal than form, it not only surrounds everything, but also exists within everything.
When we happen upon a moment when our consciousness is on the space (rather than engrossed in its contents), it usually feels good – our stories fall away and we expand into that space (because we are the space!). But the ego doesn’t like it. “Hey! Don’t forget about me!” it yells. “Come back! I’ve got some juicy gossip and some intense fears and a long list of grievances with the world!”
It seems crazy to go back to that – a reality marked largely by conflict and resistance – but we all do it. The ego is hooked up our survival mechanisms and it’s able to produce some compelling thoughts and feelings which shrink our consciousness like a turtle pulling into its shell. “It’s smelly and dark and crowded in here,” some part of us registers, “but it’s familiar.”
So, holding space in the second sense means maintaining the space – staying expanded, bringing in and honoring Spirit. We prevent encroachment upon or eclipsing of that space mainly by abstaining from the compulsion to fill it up with our stuff.
In the case of the chicken scene, it would have been a difficult setting in which to hold space for all the layers needing illumination (from the suffering of innocent creatures, to the knowing that we are complicit in this if we buy chicken, eggs, or pet food, and so on). But there are opportunities for space-holding all the time, and I see the magic of it so clearly at these Illuminator trainings – the magic of a whole room of coaches holding space for one individual to see themselves, heal, and blossom.
Holding space isn’t just for a formal coach-client or healer-patient setting, it’s a practice by which the mundane becomes holy, and we can do it all the time. At first (and sometimes later) it can feel like hard work. It takes discipline to stop thinking and to instead hold your attention on the Now. It takes trust to not intervene or analyze. But it’s deeply rewarding.
When you hold space for someone, even if they don’t know what you’re doing, they tend to experience that spaciousness. There’s more space between their thoughts. There’s a broadening of perspective and they access their resources. They begin to open and heal. Your space-holding is like a bridge that helps them connect with their Higher Self.
You can hold space for anything, for any and every moment. Things that are naturally riveting – like a baby being born – can be easier to hold space for because they’re so uncommon and so obviously miraculous. However, there’s much to be learned and experienced through holding space for the “everyday” – for the blowing of a tree in the breeze, for the dripping of a water faucet, for the barking of a dog. One of the most fundamental yet profound meditative practices is to simply hold space for your own breath. Let’s both hold space for whatever is happening right now for the next thirty seconds.
Mmmm. That was good. It reminded me of something I wanted to tell you: thinking is optional. I know we all have times when we can’t seem to turn off our mind, but just as you can stop talking aloud, you can stop talking inside. It’s an expression of reverence for the space to take a break from talking once in a while.
Be well,
Peter
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While some cultures have longstanding traditions to celebrate their mothers, ours didn’t begin until about 1911 when all the states adopted Mother’s Day. It was the culmination of a campaign begun in 1905 by Anna Jarvis in honor of her late mother, Anne Reeves Jarvis, who had worked for peace and tended to wounded soldiers from both sides during the Civil War.
In 1914, Woodrow Wilson made Mother’s Day a national holiday, and within a decade companies were capitalizing on it with cards, chocolate, and bouquets. Jarvis didn’t like it. She was so opposed to the commercialization of Mother’s Day that she organized boycotts against it and was once arrested for disturbing the peace when she freaked out about people selling white carnations – her mother’s favorite flower – for the holiday. When she discovered that a restaurant was selling a “Mother’s Day Salad,” she ordered one and dumped it on the floor. Jarvis felt that no mother would prefer a gift over a visit or heartfelt letter. (However, had she known about massages and skin care at The Dragontree, she would have undoubtedly been in support of getting these services for your mom.) ;)
In honor of Jarvis and the original spirit of the holiday I’d like to talk about mothers and what they mean to us. I’m lucky to have a good relationship with my mom, but I know it’s complicated for many people. Mothers almost never have any training in mothering. There aren’t any prerequisites for bearing children. You don’t need to have healed your psychological wounds. You don’t need to understand kids, nutrition, scheduling, or housekeeping. You don’t have to be sober, you don’t need self-esteem, you don’t need to be in a safe relationship, and don’t need communication skills. If your mother had most of these managed, perhaps you’re luckier than you think.
I was talking with a patient last week about her strained relationship with her mother and she said something to the effect of, “I know I should just stop expecting her to be different than she is, because she’s not going to change.” I’ve heard this statement a lot about parents, and I think it’s worth exploring.
It’s so common to want your mom to be different – to be supportive, to listen to you, to accept your choices, to love you unconditionally. Is this unreasonable? Of course not. These are the qualities of the archetypal Mother and they’re what everyone wants.
(Aside: If your mama embodies these qualities, take a moment for gratitude. Also, even if your mother is no longer living, you may still struggle with the history of your relationship, and healing is still possible.)
As for whether the person who gave birth to you is capable of embodying these qualities, that’s another story. She’s a human with her own weaknesses, wounds, and baggage. Maybe she never had these qualities modeled by her own mother. Maybe she’s too wrapped up in her own inner turmoil to be able to extend this kind of presence to her children. If your mother has failed to embody these qualities, you have two main options. Option one is blame and resentment. Option two is to see her and forgive her.
Maybe you’re thinking, “Wait. This is about getting my mother to be a better mother to me and it sounds like you’re directing me to help her.”
True. While we grow up thinking of the parent-child relationship as a mostly one-way street, it’s not. I believe it’s possible that you and your mom were brought together because of the potential for you to help her. And that can occur through your choosing to hold space for whomever she really is.
You’ll have to let go, at least momentarily, of any beliefs about who she should be and how your relationship should be. Open the space in your consciousness to allow for this whole woman. If you feel resistance in your body, welcome the sensation and let it pass through you. Breathe deeply. Keep your heart open. Hold her in your awareness without judgement. Forgive her – for everything. When you feel a sense of peace or resolution, I suggest you journal about it.
What if she was absolutely rotten to you? Well, I’m not suggesting you must be in an active relationship with her, nor that you even have to like her. What I want for you and your mother (and everyone) is freedom. The freedom to be however you are, and the freedom for her to be however she is. This doesn’t mean you can’t communicate requests that she treat you differently, but it does mean that she gets to decide if and how she honors those requests.
You’ll have an easier time allowing greater freedom into this relationship when you broaden your concept of what mothering means and where it comes from. While your mother gave you a body and fed you for many years, she may or may not have consciously guided you through the transition out of needing her, and this is important. If she didn’t help you in this regard, forgive her. She may not have known to do this; she may not have known how; and she may have felt incapable of supporting you to become less dependent on her because it felt like losing you. But that’s what the healthy mothering arc looks like – a transition from direct mothering to indirect mothering, and from dependence on her to independence and the ability to recognize your own needs and find ways to get them met.
I was only slightly kidding about Dragontree massages at the beginning of this article. Receiving compassionate touch is one of the many ways we connect with that mothered feeling of being held, understood, and nurtured. Some other ways include:
- Feeding ourselves well or allowing ourselves to be fed
- Connecting with the earth, feeling the soil and the rhythm of the planet
- Bathing ourselves lovingly (or, again, allowing ourselves to be bathed)
- Being listened to by a good friend and accepting their care
- Singing – to ourselves and others – and being sung to
I have a homework assignment for you. Try one of these (or another way in which you are nourished in this same way) this week and really focus on receiving it. When you know the ways in which you register motherly love and you let yourself receive it, you’ll notice that there’s less pressure on your biological mother to provide this for you. More freedom for you, more freedom for her.
Be well,
Peter
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[is_page] =>
[is_archive] => 1
[is_date] =>
[is_year] =>
[is_month] =>
[is_day] =>
[is_time] =>
[is_author] =>
[is_category] => 1
[is_tag] =>
[is_tax] =>
[is_search] =>
[is_feed] =>
[is_comment_feed] =>
[is_trackback] =>
[is_home] =>
[is_privacy_policy] =>
[is_404] =>
[is_embed] =>
[is_paged] =>
[is_admin] =>
[is_attachment] =>
[is_singular] =>
[is_robots] =>
[is_favicon] =>
[is_posts_page] =>
[is_post_type_archive] =>
[query_vars_hash:WP_Query:private] => b0b14c3dd74da0c3e434bfcd3586b317
[query_vars_changed:WP_Query:private] =>
[thumbnails_cached] =>
[allow_query_attachment_by_filename:protected] =>
[stopwords:WP_Query:private] =>
[compat_fields:WP_Query:private] => Array
(
[0] => query_vars_hash
[1] => query_vars_changed
)
[compat_methods:WP_Query:private] => Array
(
[0] => init_query_flags
[1] => parse_tax_query
)
)