Cart

root chakra

Getting to the Root of the Matter: Understanding Your Foundation in Your Root Chakra.

A couple weeks ago, I wrote an article introducing the Indian concept of chakras and explained them from a variety of different perspectives. The prevailing classical perspective is that they… Read More

In this first example, we’re looking at the intersection of desire and fear with that of being in control versus out of control. Wanting control is a primary human motivator. A great many of our upsets can be traced to an underlying fear of being out of control. But pursuing control may amplify the belief that we’re not in control. This can be a tricky catch-22 to work with. So if you have a strong desire to be in control (upper right quadrant), you’d do well to address yourself to the fear of being out of control (lower left). These are easy for most people to access. Can you think of a situation that arouses the fear of being out of control? Holding that in mind, what happens in your body? Can you feel some physical unease? What happens if you don’t resist that feeling? What happens if you even invite it to be felt with your whole being, willingly allowing it spread over you? And what happens when you imagine opening yourself, like opening a closed fist that contains a butterfly, and let it peacefully depart? If this process diminished the intensity of the feeling, but not completely, try doing it several times in succession. For more on this form of body-centered releasing, check out our book, Freedom. Less obvious – but not uncommon – is the fear of being in control (lower right quadrant). If you’re in control, does that mean whatever happens is your fault? Maybe being in control feels like too much responsibility. If control issues are significant for you, I encourage you to do the process described in the last paragraph with the idea of situation in which you are in control. What comes up? Last, there’s the desire to be out of control (lower left quadrant). Though this may seem totally foreign to someone who’s rigidly clenching around every aspect of life, there’s always a hidden part that yearns for the relief of being out of control. Anyone who’s ever been to a college party at the end of finals has witnessed plenty of desire to be out of control. Try visiting with all four quadrants and journaling about how each state exists in you. You might also have fun with the following variation – desire and fear of independence versus dependence.

This is a major dynamic in kids and adolescents, and it’s not helped by the fact that parents often give mixed messages. On the one hand, we may be telling our kids to stay attached to the family, don’t try to get your needs met by your inept peers, and keep coming to us for support and advice. On the other, we’re telling them to grow up, do more things for themselves, get themselves ready for school, figure out their homework, and navigate new situations with minimal guidance. When we see them shifting their attachment from the family to their peers, we often mistake this for independence, when they’ve actually become dependent on peers for approval and direction. It's probably easy for them to access the desire to be independent, even if it’s scary, because our society puts so much value on it. If we can help them recognize the other three quadrants, it may help to neutralize some of the inner and outer forces, and allow them to be accepting of where they are and comfortable with striking a balance. Of course these dynamics don’t necessarily end when adolescence does. We may find ourselves struggling with the dimensions of dependence and independence in our adult relationships, and when handicapped, ill, or elderly. Exploration and peacemaking with these states may support a peaceful resolution. Be well, Peter P.S. If you find this exploration interesting, perhaps you’d enjoy guiding others through processes like these. Check out the Dragontree Coaching Program. In the advanced Illuminator training, we go even deeper into these processes. [post_title] => Meeting the Part of Yourself That Wants to Be Out of Control [post_excerpt] => [post_status] => publish [comment_status] => open [ping_status] => open [post_password] => [post_name] => meeting-the-part-of-yourself-that-wants-to-be-out-of-control [to_ping] => [pinged] => [post_modified] => 2022-02-24 23:28:41 [post_modified_gmt] => 2022-02-24 23:28:41 [post_content_filtered] => [post_parent] => 0 [guid] => https://thedragontree.com/?p=8572 [menu_order] => 0 [post_type] => post [post_mime_type] => [comment_count] => 0 [filter] => raw [webinar_id] => 0 ) [1] => WP_Post Object ( [ID] => 8447 [post_author] => 3 [post_date] => 2022-01-09 00:16:00 [post_date_gmt] => 2022-01-09 00:16:00 [post_content] => This year I’ll be writing a book about reconnecting with the natural world. This was the subject of my doctoral thesis years ago, but while that was a 500-page document that few people would want to slog through, I’m finally revising it into a work that’s shorter and accessible. The crux of it is the idea that we belong to Nature – though we’ve forgotten this. Nature isn’t just scenery; it’s the substances and forces that created us and provide for all our needs. It also isn’t just a bunch of resources; it’s our greatest teacher. It’s constantly displaying lessons on how to be in balance and have a fruitful life, and it demonstrates a vast palate of virtues that are available to us. All we need to do is remember. Today I’m going to share a little blurb from the section on Water. Here I discuss the virtue of clarity or transparency. As you read the following, see if you can call up an image of the clearest water. Imagine that every water molecule in your body (and it’s about two-thirds of what you are) contains the virtue of clarity – it’s already in you. One of water’s most striking characteristics is its transparency. Just as clarity is the foremost measure of quality in a jewel, so is there something magical about clear water. Have you ever visited water that’s so lucent you can see the rocks and fish below as if looking through a window? If we're going to drink it, the clearer the better, since this tends to signal purity. If we plan to swim or bathe in it, clarity means safety - it has nothing to hide. And if we aim to be refreshed, clear water is the ticket for cooling us, moistening us, and cleaning us out. When we embody clarity, it has a similar effect on our experience of life and others’ experience of us - pure, clean, refreshing, nothing hidden. Few things are as conducive to both power and peace as a clear mind. With clarity, we avoid most conflict. Our energy can be invested more wisely. When we’re transparent, we know ourselves. We’re aware of our strengths and weaknesses. We know what we're capable of and to what extent we’re channeling or obstructing our potential. We have a realistic accounting of our resources. We see clearly how we’re utilizing them and what kind of return we get on this expenditure. With a clear mind the process by which our authentic will expresses potential through us proceeds in a healthy, efficient, and beautiful way. If fear and social programming degrade our clarity, we may override the will, investing ourselves instead in behaviors that secure our safety and approval. When we’re transparent around agreements, we commit ourselves only to what we know we can follow through on. We keep all the agreements we make - both with others and ourselves - and this builds self-trust. The unknown is less frightening when we know we can trust ourselves. If we break an agreement, we recognize immediately the clouding effect this has on our inner waters and we clean it up. If we keep secrets or try to hide things from ourselves (such as the truth of how well we’ve followed through on an agreement), it fragments us and makes transparency impossible. It also makes us less trusting of others. When we instead prioritize clarity and stop the hiding and secrecy, we dispel potential sources of fear. Clarity makes us less prone to being controlled by our emotions - especially fear. Sometimes we can be manipulated by fear even while avoiding it or pushing it away. This can form a certain cloudiness around the fear which might make it less intense, but also results in a chronic, vague anxiousness. When we insist on clarity, this means facing the fear and being with it willingly. It can be daunting, but the shift in attitude - from avoidance to curiosity and bravery - immediately changes the experience. The emotional volume diminishes and we can rationally ask ourselves, “Is this something to be afraid of? To be concerned about? Of no concern at all?” And if it warrants action we can clearly ask, “What am I going to do so that I’m reasonably protected from harm if such-and-such should happen?” In a fearful state, one of the most useful things we can do is to tell ourselves the pure, unmanipulated truth about our circumstances. No “what ifs,” no stories. Just the facts. This gets us quickly to clarity. While it's possible to be afraid even in a clear state, the majority of our fears are unreal except in the murky waters of an unclear mind. Just as a lack of clarity creates shadows where fear can develop, fear further distorts our clarity, like a storm over the sea that makes the water too choppy to see through. When we feel uncertain about what’s beneath, we tend to stay on the surface, but this only keeps us immersed in the turmoil. Though it may seem counterintuitive, diving deeper takes us to an underlying stillness that’s unaffected by the waves on the surface. I encourage you to spend some time soon with clear water. Let it arouse the virtue of clarity within you, and invite that clarity into all corners of your life. Be well, Peter [post_title] => The Virtue of Clarity: A Gift from Water That's Available to Everyone [post_excerpt] => [post_status] => publish [comment_status] => open [ping_status] => open [post_password] => [post_name] => the-virtue-of-clarity-a-gift-from-water-thats-available-to-everyone [to_ping] => [pinged] => [post_modified] => 2022-01-09 00:23:45 [post_modified_gmt] => 2022-01-09 00:23:45 [post_content_filtered] => [post_parent] => 0 [guid] => https://thedragontree.com/?p=8447 [menu_order] => 0 [post_type] => post [post_mime_type] => [comment_count] => 11 [filter] => raw [webinar_id] => 0 ) [2] => WP_Post Object ( [ID] => 9018 [post_author] => 5 [post_date] => 2023-04-24 16:45:40 [post_date_gmt] => 2023-04-24 16:45:40 [post_content] => When building with wood, I spent years trying to figure everything out by myself before it finally occurred to me that a book might be helpful. I found one with lots of pretty pictures and I turned to the section on saws. I was curious to see what kind of advice a book might offer beyond pushing and pulling the saw back and forth. There I came across an unexpected piece of advice: Think the saw down the line. Sure, the book discussed examining the teeth of the saw, holding it at the right angle, keeping your elbow in close to your side, and other practical stuff. But here was this oddly magical recommendation in a book on wood. The writer went on to explain that generations of woodworkers have done this, and that he was passing it on because it just plain works. The idea is, rather than focusing on manipulating the saw, you focus on the line and use your intention to will the saw to follow it. It might have sounded crazier if I hadn’t heard of a similar approach to golf. While not exactly known as a sport dominated by new agey thinkers, many golfers do step into woo-woo territory if they think it will help their game. The most common of such practices is visualizing the event as one would like it to go – for instance, a smooth swing, hitting the ball just right, the ball soaring through the air, landing on the green, and rolling into the hole. Athletes now utilize this technique in virtually every sport, from gymnastics to skeeball. There are even studies showing that “practicing” musical instruments through intention alone (imagining oneself playing piano, for example) leads to measurable improvements in skill. And yet, I would guess that the deliberate application of intention as a success strategy (outside of sports) isn’t a practice that has made it into most people’s daily lives. If it works on balls and saws, why not use it to make a million dollars or to find a fulfilling relationship? Here are some recommendations for translating this practice to life-creation:

Clarify. The arc of a ball from golf club to hole is simple to visualize. The arc from, say, a new business idea to a flourishing company is less simple. This makes it harder to visualize and therefore more difficult to grease the rails with intention. You can improve your chances by developing a very clear intention statement using positive language, such as “My business will be earning $100k per month by April 2024.” You can also consider the greater arc as a dot-to-dot with numerous smaller achievements along the way, and create a “sub-intention” for each. Visualizing these shorter distances may be more manageable.
Potentiate. You can check your intention statement for potency by saying it out loud (to yourself or a friend). How does it feel? Is there a word that needs tweaking? Is it too vague? Or does it fill you with a charge of inspiration? Keep modifying until it feels really good.
Scribe. Write down your intention statement to make it more real. Use a nice pen and a nice piece of paper. Take your time to get it right.
Activate. Especially for big goals, you can add potency by enacting your intention in a special way. Consider this process as a starting point: Get into a calm clear mind space, light a candle, state that this ritual is to activate and amplify this intention, and ask for the guidance and support of the universe. As you focus on your intention statement, try to get as much of your whole self on board with it. Imagine that you are making this intention not just with your voice and your mind, but with your heart, with your gut, with every cell and every atom of your being. Imagine all parts of you are aligned in proclaiming this. Let go of any resistance. Thank the universe for hearing and responding. One of my favorite additions to this process is to use a piece of our Intention Paper, writing the intention on it and burning it to transform it from matter to energy and send it out into the world.
Sustain. In the case of throwing a dart toward a bullseye, you’re ideally holding an intention from the moment you start thinking about it until the dart hits something. That’s not a very long time. Making a million dollars will probably take a bit longer. It’s not always possible to continually hold an intention from conception to fruition, but do whatever you can to keep yourself conscious of what you’re creating. At the least, re-read your intention statement daily. Even better, visualize its actualization for five minutes a day. Even better, feel how you’re going to feel when you’re at the destination.
Act. When you intend a golf ball to go into a hole, it’s helped along tremendously by your hitting the ball in the direction of the hole. With intention alone, it still might get there eventually, but it’s probably not a common occurrence – especially for someone who isn’t especially practiced in the art of conscious intentioning. The same goes for using intention toward life goals. Don’t put all your eggs in the intention basket, but do maximize the potential of this avenue while also taking physical steps to put yourself out there where opportunities happen.
Notice and Receive. A vital part of effective intentioning is noticing the good things that come to you and receiving them wholeheartedly. This single step can make more difference in your life than all the others.

Whereas we often use only step six (taking physical action), practicing the other six can greatly enhance our ability to shape life as we desire. Beyond whatever tangible gains this approach might produce, I feel there are wonderful intangible benefits as well. Ultimately it builds self-trust, promotes gratitude, helps us recognize of the potent role our perception plays in our quality of life, and reminds us that choice is always available. Be well, Peter [post_title] => Seven Steps for Harnessing the Power of Your Intention [post_excerpt] => [post_status] => publish [comment_status] => open [ping_status] => open [post_password] => [post_name] => seven-steps-for-harnessing-the-power-of-your-intention [to_ping] => [pinged] => [post_modified] => 2023-04-24 16:45:40 [post_modified_gmt] => 2023-04-24 16:45:40 [post_content_filtered] => [post_parent] => 0 [guid] => https://thedragontree.com/?p=9018 [menu_order] => 0 [post_type] => post [post_mime_type] => [comment_count] => 0 [filter] => raw [webinar_id] => 0 ) ) [post_count] => 3 [current_post] => -1 [before_loop] => 1 [in_the_loop] => [post] => WP_Post Object ( [ID] => 8572 [post_author] => 3 [post_date] => 2022-03-13 12:00:19 [post_date_gmt] => 2022-03-13 12:00:19 [post_content] => Last week I discussed our tendency to get attached to a single point of view, and how this often keeps us stuck. When we recognize the validity of other perspectives – and allow that both sides are within us (and also in our adversaries, be they real or imaginary) – this helps to neutralize the issue. For a deeper and more thorough exploration, we can look at the two sides of an issue intersected with the push and pull of desire and fear (or attraction and repulsion). It’s a process Leslie Temple Thurston simply calls “squares.” Here are some examples. If you find them challenging, I encourage you to work through them. If not, I hope they help you understand how the exercise works and lead you to the patterns that are relevant to you.

You may also be interested in:

Meeting the Part of Yourself That Wants to Be Out of Control

The Virtue of Clarity: A Gift from Water That’s Available to Everyone

Seven Steps for Harnessing the Power of Your Intention

The Dragontree

root chakra

Getting to the Root of the Matter: Understanding Your Foundation in Your Root Chakra.

The Dragontree and its Founders have been Featured in