We’ve had many clients ask us the big question:
Should I stay in a job that doesn’t feel right?

It’s a tough one—because sometimes it is the job, and sometimes it’s you. And sometimes it doesn’t matter which it is—because if you’re not willing or able to change the circumstances or your relationship to them, it’s just not going to work.

So how do you know when a change is in order? Start by asking yourself if any of these apply to your relationship with work:

1. You’re bringing negative energy from your work life into the rest of your life. Your work life is spilling over into - and degrading - your non-work life. 

2. You feel guilty or conflicted about aspects of the work you do, or how the company operates.  

3. You’re trying to isolate your career from the rest of your life (or from your own consciousness). For instance, you tell yourself, “It’s only my job” or “Well, it pays the bills.”

4. You’re unenthusiastic, bored, or tuning out at work. 

5. You feel unable to fit into, and/or unaccepted by, the company culture. 

6. You dread going to work. 

7. You’re “phoning it in” or “half-assing it.” Or you start doing things to sabotage your work. 

8. You start making careless mistakes. 

9. Your work environment feels “toxic” - for instance, your coworkers or boss is verbally abusive or hostile in other ways, or aspects of the environment are causing harm. 

The more of these you resonate with, the more likely it is that something isn’t right. That doesn’t always mean you need a new job—but it does mean something needs to change.

A good place to begin is by identifying your career non-negotiables—the things you need in order to thrive. Not just what you want (a corner office, a shorter commute), but what your soul and sanity require: alignment with your values, creative expression, feeling safe and appreciated, having a sense of purpose, etc.

Once you’re clear on your needs, the path becomes simpler. If a need isn’t being met, you have two choices:

1. Explore whether the need can be met by making a change.

2. Start looking elsewhere.

If, on the other hand, you determine that the job really does meet your needs, then the problem is something else. Maybe the issue is your own buttons or limiting beliefs. If so, the good news is you don’t need to start job hunting. You may need to do some personal work that could be at least as challenging as changing jobs, but this will serve you much more than switching workplaces. 

However you decide to manage it, I’d like to suggest Sacred Expansion - a stand-alone portion of the Dragontree Life Coach training - as a powerful and effective way to know yourself, release baggage, and get super clear on what you want (and need). And hey, if you actually do want to change jobs, you might consider becoming a life coach. The world needs more people helping others to live to their potential, and our program is great.

You don’t have to stay stuck. Whether the shift happens inside of you or through a new direction, you deserve work that nourishes your spirit.

Be well,

Dr. Peter Borten