Did you have a time of reckoning in early adulthood when you realized with great clarity that your life is up to you? I remember discovering that I had subconsciously brought with me from childhood the excuse that other kids are misbehaving too. Like, other kids didn’t do their homework either. So, why should I? 

Later it was something like, other kids also didn’t come to a complete stop at the stop sign. Still later it was, other kids also stayed up too late drinking and missed an important exam in the morning. 

The realization that I had been operating this way sparked an awareness of my agency. Like many young people, I swung from one extreme to the other, and the conclusion was: it’s only me. Only I get to choose how I see the world, only I get to decide if I have lived this life well. Only I am responsible for taking care of this body, setting my alarm, getting out of bed, and completing my daily tasks. On my death bed, nobody else’s opinions or approval matter.

There was a lot of value in this realization, but it came with a fair amount of stress and guilt. And it wasn’t as absolute as I first thought. 

I hadn’t factored community into the equation.

True, your friends can’t cause you to eat right and live to your potential. But if they’re good friends they can encourage you, inspire you, and kick your ass when needed. I didn’t really have this kind of community or realize how vital it Is – and how good it can be – until I was about 40 (I’m 51 now). 

In fact, I was just on the verge of this discovery when Briana and I released the Dreambook. At the time, our primary focus was to support individuals to craft and actualize the life they have dreamed of. But an unexpected revelation came in the years since its launch: just how profound the role of community can be in this process. 

We gathered lots of testimonials from people who were using the book and making big positive changes in their lives, but we also saw how difficult the process was for others who were doing it on their own. So, we started an online forum on Facebook so users could share ideas, get support, and offer help – and it’s given us an amazing window through which we’ve been able to witness the synergy that occurs through community.

As soon as people share their dreams, something changes. Rather than being ideas on paper, their dreams become living things that hum in the collective field. We’ve seen how shared intentions magnify accountability, courage, and hope. We’ve watched the group celebrate the wins of the individual as if it’s good for the whole (and it is). 

I encourage you to visit the group and join. It’s a warm, wise, creative gathering place — full of people who are dreaming, planning, stumbling, celebrating, and beginning again. 

If you’re doing this work alone, come meet us there. You’ll find encouragement, inspiration, and gentle ass-kicking. If you’re already in the group, maybe it’s time to share your own insights or ask for the support you’ve been hesitant to receive.

Thanks for being part of my community and take care, 

Peter