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[post_content] => I have written so much about what and how to eat, so I thought I’d say a few words about what we might do before and after a meal to enhance the experience.
First, the before-meals recommendations:
1) Set an intention. This applies to food, medicine, and supplements, though I think it especially makes sense for medicine and supplements because you had a specific outcome in mind when you bought them.
I believe there’s some value in stating to yourself what you want to happen whenever you put something into your body. Even if you’re doubtful about your ability to influence your body’s inner workings, perhaps you’ll find it worthwhile to just get clear for a moment on why exactly you’re swallowing something. But if we consider how powerful the placebo effect is – it’s not a matter of being fooled into believing we feel better, but a very real ability to cause our bodies and minds to change – isn’t this worth taking full advantage of?
When I say “set an intention,” I don’t mean you have to have an elaborate ritual (although if you want to light a candle and take your time with it, that’s great). I really just mean taking about 10 to 30 seconds to close your eyes, recognize that you’re about to introduce a new influence into your system, state clearly what you intend to get out of it, and feel grateful.
What do you want this new influence to do? Please you with its flavor, texture, and a satisfying feeling in your stomach? Make you feel grounded? Give you energy? Nourish you in the deepest places? Calm your mind? Repair something that is out of balance? Help you feel connected to the world? Build your muscles? Expressing your choice may make a difference.
2) Make sure you’re hungry. I should have said this first, but I wanted to make sure you saw the part about intention. It should be at least two hours since you last ate, and in my opinion, it’s best to avoid snacking between meals (though four or five small meals per day is fine). If it has been several hours since you last ate and you know you should be hungry, but you have a poor appetite, you can try taking some bitters before the meal, such as 15 drops of gentian tincture in a little water. Others prefer blends of bitters with aromatic herbs, such as citrus peel, cardamom, and ginger. Luckily, there is a wide selection of great bitters these days.
3) Make sure you’re not starving. If you skipped breakfast and now it’s lunch time, it’s quite possible that you’re going to eat faster than your body would like and more than your body would like. If meal skipping is a common thing for you, it’s also possible that your metabolism has slowed down, and it will be easy to eat more than your body can readily burn. I recommend not going more than about four hours between meals. If you’re already starving, of course you need to eat, but try doing it slowly. Next time, eat sooner.
4) Let everything go. Stop moving, sit down, and to the best of your ability, set aside anything you’re worrying about. Now it’s time to feed yourself and that deserves your full attention and enjoyment.
After you eat:
1) Set an intention again. You can spare 10 seconds to do this. You just filled yourself up and maybe forgot about that starting intention until now. So, once again, consider what you would like to happen with what you just consumed and state it clearly to yourself. For example: “Thank you for this meal. I intend that all the nutrients will be well absorbed and will go exactly where they’re needed in my body.” Or, “I’m grateful for this meal and intend to be thoroughly nourished and energized by it.”
Once, when I was doing a lot of qigong, I went out to eat with a friend. After finishing my food, while continuing to converse with her, I imagined I was sucking all the energy from the food through my digestive tract into all my cells. It was something I was practicing at the time, it only took a minute, and I thought I wasn’t giving any outward appearance of doing anything. But my friend’s eyes bulged out and she yelled, “What the hell did you just do?!” I explained what I had been up to and was very curious as to what she perceived. She said she couldn’t really explain it, but that it looked like my whole body came alive (I’m assuming she meant more alive). Regardless of what it looked like to her, I was just struck by the fact that my internal visualization had an outwardly noticeable effect. So, try it!
2) Relax. If possible, don’t get right back to your work or something that stresses you out. Give your body at least a few minutes to assimilate what you just consumed.
3) Take a walk. Vigorous exercise right after eating isn’t a great idea, but a walk is fine (after a brief rest), and will assist with digestion, especially after a big meal.
Give these easy practices a try. I believe that even if your food choices aren’t always excellent, you’ll be much better off if you observe these simple acts. Let me know what happens.
Be well ,
Dr. Peter Borten
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Hi there!
We’re so excited that you’re going to be joining us for 9-weeks of strategic and heart centered action to create a meaningful life.
For years, people have been asking us how we do it. Starting in our 20s, we launched several successful businesses promoting body-mind wellness, including private healthcare practices, three spas, online courses, a magazine, a book, a café, and a company that makes body care products and herbal tinctures. Meanwhile, we have an ecstatic marriage, a light work week, we spend lots of time with our kids and pets, and we have as much fun as possible.
We don’t claim to have all the answers, but we’ve learned a few things along the way. In particular, we’ve discovered that as important as it to teach people things like healthy eating and stretching, most folks need at least as much instruction in putting together a balanced and satisfying life.
When we realized we wanted to help others structure their lives, we talked to many friends and clients and the majority expressed that they felt far from achieving the life of their dreams. When we asked what they were doing to make their dreams come true, we found that most weren’t actively pursuing them.
To begin with, almost no one was clear about what their dreams actually were. They had lost touch with them after deciding (probably unconsciously and long ago) that it’s unrealistic to want an amazing or magical life. Some had even convinced themselves that it was more mature to expect lots of compromises and to learn to be content with whatever hand you’re dealt. But, they weren’t content. They had forgotten what they really wanted out of life or denied that they wanted anything different than what they had.
Many claimed they weren’t pursuing big dreams because they believed this would mean working like a dog and being unhappy. They felt that unless someone was superhuman, the only way to succeed was by sacrificing the enjoyment of life and perhaps losing your soul.
So, what were these folks doing in their free time if not making progress on their goals? Perhaps having fun, being in nature, and engaging in creative projects? Well, no. No, in fact, most felt that not only were they failing to reach their goals, but also that they weren’t making the time to cook, to stretch, to breathe, or to do other soul-nourishing self-care activities that they knew were important.
Those who had chosen to bite the bullet and put their noses to the grindstone in pursuit of their dreams tended to unwittingly ensure that they were unhappy because of how deeply enrolled they were in the belief that achievement demanded sacrifice. The things that make life sweet were often the first to go.
Finally, nearly everyone – whether actively pursuing their dreams or not – felt busy. Too busy. Not just because of their work, but because of their immersion in a relentless data stream that engages them in the job of perpetually checking in and keeping tabs on an endless volume of information. For those who believe they’re not doing enough, it offers a way to feel more busy, but because it’s unceasing, it comes to feel like an obligation. However much time and energy they devote to it, it never feels truly gratifying or productive.
We believe that balance is possible – even in the face of chaos.
And we believe that you can – you must – do the good-feeling, soul-nourishing, body-fortifying activities even while you pursue your dreams. We put these practices under the general heading we call Sweetness. Sweetness not only makes life more satisfying, it also makes us stronger and more resilient.
If you feed your life, your body, and your soul, you become more effective at shaping this life however you choose. If you fill your life with this sweetness, you bring yourself many steps closer to the life of your dreams, regardless of the outcome of any particular goal. If your goals don’t materialize, at least you haven’t spent years of your life immersed in work with little to show for it. No, just the opposite: you will have spent the time doing meaningful work, living your purpose, treating yourself well, enjoying the world, and serving your species. It doesn’t get much better than that.
And when you do achieve your dreams, if you’ve been feeding your soul and growing all the while, you’ll be better able to assimilate the new changes in a healthy way.
While integrating more sweetness adds thrust to our dreams (and even brings our current circumstances closer to our dream life) we knew from coaching others that the biggest hindrance to achievement was problems with structure. They either didn’t know how or never got around to building a structure to get them from point A to point B. Some resisted structure because they seemed to equate it with restriction or conformity. Others had learned about “manifesting” concepts, such as the Law of Attraction, and took this to mean that structure and work are needless or even misguided.
When we looked at the structures people had in place, we found that without much training in life architecture, they were often unclear about how to build stable structures that would get them to their dreams. Some structures were like a bridge made of clothesline suspended over a canyon – they seemed to span the distance, but lacked support. Making it across would depend on a massive amount of personal effort, focus, and luck. Other structures were more like a concrete pipe over a chasm – sturdier to walk through but at the expense of any enjoyment of the scenery. Still other structures were like complicated tangles of trusses, cables, and parapets – more likely to get the traveler lost and confused than to their destination.
We noticed that those who avoided structure weren’t as free and unfettered as they would have liked. Instead, they often felt scattered and preoccupied, as if they were juggling all the ideas and tasks that they weren’t building into a plan. We wondered if the reason for their resisting Structure was that it wasn’t married to sweetness; Structure without sweetness could feel cold and meaningless to people, like striving for advancement in a factory run by robots.
We also observed an unusual trend toward over-structured lives, even among people who seemed to have very little going on. It was as if the structure developed independently of a guiding vision – structure for the sake of structure – with very little breathing room. Both the desire to eschew structure and the trend toward hyper-structure highlighted the necessity of Space.
Space is one of those things we tend not to value until it’s been missing for a while. Few people would identify it as a priority, and yet, it’s an essential factor in a healthy, happy, and fulfilling life. Without space, there is no perspective or clarity. Imagine there’s a large mural painted on the side of a building, but because the adjacent building is just a foot away, you have to stand in a tight alley in order to look at it, so you’re only able to see one small section at a time. This is how we view our lives when space is lacking. Space allows structure to breathe.
Space is the crucible in which sweetness and structure interact to yield a life that feels inspired, meaningful, and fun. Through our background in Asian philosophy, we both came to appreciate the preeminence of the “emptiness” from which everything is born. In Taoism, it is called Wuji, the limitless, boundless, or most literally, the non-polar. That is, it’s where our expanded consciousness resides, which isn’t polarized, doesn’t need to take a position, and is simply open. In Buddhism, it is Sunyata – emptiness, openness, or spaciousness – the space in which the soul is unconfined by the mind. In Ayurveda, it is Akasha – space or ether – the origin and essence of the entire material world.
Alignment and healing can’t occur without the openness that space provides. Sweetness needs space in order to be rooted in authenticity and to penetrate, engage, and feed the deepest parts of ourselves. And space is the solution to our addiction to the data stream which attaches us to our devices and disconnects us from the magic of the natural world around us.
Together, structure, space, and sweetness are the underpinning of this course.
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Happy (almost) spring equinox! At the halfway point between the solstices, the equinox is a time of balance between day and night, hot and cold, and yin and yang. It’s a good time to tune in to your current state of balance (or lack thereof).
Take stock. Balance doesn’t imply that everything is equal, just that there is a state of relative harmony between opposing forces. If you have a couple minutes I encourage you to read the following questions as an assessment of personal balance. Take a pause after reading each question to let it sink in.
- How is your balance of movement and stillness? (Sitting vs moving; thinking vs quiet mind; sleep time vs awake time, etc.)
- How is your balance of work and leisure?
- How is your balance of community and solitude?
- How is your balance of communicating versus listening?
- How is your balance of doing versus being?
- How is your balance of holding on and letting go?
- How is your balance of connecting with your inner world versus the outer world?
- How is your balance of creating versus receiving?
- How is your balance of filling yourself up versus emptying yourself out?
- How is your balance of engagement with technology versus engagement with nature?
- How is your balance of preparing for the future versus being in the present?
- How is your balance of consumption of resources versus giving back?
- How is your balance of being mind-centered versus heart-centered?
While this isn’t a totally comprehensive list, I hope it provoked some insight. If you’re human, I’m sure you noticed certain areas where you’re out of balance. I encourage you to think of balance as a dynamic thing – just like the balance between night and day and all the natural forces. Don’t strive for perfection.
Consider taking a card and writing down a few of the activities / orientations from above that are lacking in your life. Then try to remember, throughout your day, to bring your attention to something on your list. At the end of the day or week, reflect on how adding in small doses of balancing qualities is affecting your overall sense of well-being.
By the way, if you like this sort of thing – exploring and growing – have you ever thought about being a life coach? Click here to check out our life coach training program. It’s based on deep, meaningful principles like what I shared here!
Be well,
Dr. Peter Borten
P.S. If you’d like to take a deeper dive into your inner balance, “clean house” internally, shed patterns that aren’t working for you, and open into your highest self, check out our upcoming program Sacred Expansion. Click here for more info.
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[post_content] => I have written so much about what and how to eat, so I thought I’d say a few words about what we might do before and after a meal to enhance the experience.
First, the before-meals recommendations:
1) Set an intention. This applies to food, medicine, and supplements, though I think it especially makes sense for medicine and supplements because you had a specific outcome in mind when you bought them.
I believe there’s some value in stating to yourself what you want to happen whenever you put something into your body. Even if you’re doubtful about your ability to influence your body’s inner workings, perhaps you’ll find it worthwhile to just get clear for a moment on why exactly you’re swallowing something. But if we consider how powerful the placebo effect is – it’s not a matter of being fooled into believing we feel better, but a very real ability to cause our bodies and minds to change – isn’t this worth taking full advantage of?
When I say “set an intention,” I don’t mean you have to have an elaborate ritual (although if you want to light a candle and take your time with it, that’s great). I really just mean taking about 10 to 30 seconds to close your eyes, recognize that you’re about to introduce a new influence into your system, state clearly what you intend to get out of it, and feel grateful.
What do you want this new influence to do? Please you with its flavor, texture, and a satisfying feeling in your stomach? Make you feel grounded? Give you energy? Nourish you in the deepest places? Calm your mind? Repair something that is out of balance? Help you feel connected to the world? Build your muscles? Expressing your choice may make a difference.
2) Make sure you’re hungry. I should have said this first, but I wanted to make sure you saw the part about intention. It should be at least two hours since you last ate, and in my opinion, it’s best to avoid snacking between meals (though four or five small meals per day is fine). If it has been several hours since you last ate and you know you should be hungry, but you have a poor appetite, you can try taking some bitters before the meal, such as 15 drops of gentian tincture in a little water. Others prefer blends of bitters with aromatic herbs, such as citrus peel, cardamom, and ginger. Luckily, there is a wide selection of great bitters these days.
3) Make sure you’re not starving. If you skipped breakfast and now it’s lunch time, it’s quite possible that you’re going to eat faster than your body would like and more than your body would like. If meal skipping is a common thing for you, it’s also possible that your metabolism has slowed down, and it will be easy to eat more than your body can readily burn. I recommend not going more than about four hours between meals. If you’re already starving, of course you need to eat, but try doing it slowly. Next time, eat sooner.
4) Let everything go. Stop moving, sit down, and to the best of your ability, set aside anything you’re worrying about. Now it’s time to feed yourself and that deserves your full attention and enjoyment.
After you eat:
1) Set an intention again. You can spare 10 seconds to do this. You just filled yourself up and maybe forgot about that starting intention until now. So, once again, consider what you would like to happen with what you just consumed and state it clearly to yourself. For example: “Thank you for this meal. I intend that all the nutrients will be well absorbed and will go exactly where they’re needed in my body.” Or, “I’m grateful for this meal and intend to be thoroughly nourished and energized by it.”
Once, when I was doing a lot of qigong, I went out to eat with a friend. After finishing my food, while continuing to converse with her, I imagined I was sucking all the energy from the food through my digestive tract into all my cells. It was something I was practicing at the time, it only took a minute, and I thought I wasn’t giving any outward appearance of doing anything. But my friend’s eyes bulged out and she yelled, “What the hell did you just do?!” I explained what I had been up to and was very curious as to what she perceived. She said she couldn’t really explain it, but that it looked like my whole body came alive (I’m assuming she meant more alive). Regardless of what it looked like to her, I was just struck by the fact that my internal visualization had an outwardly noticeable effect. So, try it!
2) Relax. If possible, don’t get right back to your work or something that stresses you out. Give your body at least a few minutes to assimilate what you just consumed.
3) Take a walk. Vigorous exercise right after eating isn’t a great idea, but a walk is fine (after a brief rest), and will assist with digestion, especially after a big meal.
Give these easy practices a try. I believe that even if your food choices aren’t always excellent, you’ll be much better off if you observe these simple acts. Let me know what happens.
Be well ,
Dr. Peter Borten
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