WP_Query Object
(
[query] => Array
(
[category__in] => Array
(
[0] => 26
)
[post__not_in] => Array
(
[0] => 2605
)
[posts_per_page] => 50
[ignore_sticky_posts] => 1
[orderby] => desc
[_shuffle_and_pick] => 3
)
[query_vars] => Array
(
[category__in] => Array
(
[0] => 26
)
[post__not_in] => Array
(
[0] => 2605
)
[posts_per_page] => 50
[ignore_sticky_posts] => 1
[orderby] => desc
[_shuffle_and_pick] => 3
[error] =>
[m] =>
[p] => 0
[post_parent] =>
[subpost] =>
[subpost_id] =>
[attachment] =>
[attachment_id] => 0
[name] =>
[pagename] =>
[page_id] => 0
[second] =>
[minute] =>
[hour] =>
[day] => 0
[monthnum] => 0
[year] => 0
[w] => 0
[category_name] => relationships_forgiveness
[tag] =>
[cat] => 26
[tag_id] =>
[author] =>
[author_name] =>
[feed] =>
[tb] =>
[paged] => 0
[meta_key] =>
[meta_value] =>
[preview] =>
[s] =>
[sentence] =>
[title] =>
[fields] =>
[menu_order] =>
[embed] =>
[category__not_in] => Array
(
)
[category__and] => Array
(
)
[post__in] => Array
(
)
[post_name__in] => Array
(
)
[tag__in] => Array
(
)
[tag__not_in] => Array
(
)
[tag__and] => Array
(
)
[tag_slug__in] => Array
(
)
[tag_slug__and] => Array
(
)
[post_parent__in] => Array
(
)
[post_parent__not_in] => Array
(
)
[author__in] => Array
(
)
[author__not_in] => Array
(
)
[search_columns] => Array
(
)
[suppress_filters] =>
[cache_results] => 1
[update_post_term_cache] => 1
[update_menu_item_cache] =>
[lazy_load_term_meta] => 1
[update_post_meta_cache] => 1
[post_type] =>
[nopaging] =>
[comments_per_page] => 50
[no_found_rows] =>
[order] => DESC
)
[tax_query] => WP_Tax_Query Object
(
[queries] => Array
(
[0] => Array
(
[taxonomy] => category
[terms] => Array
(
[0] => 26
)
[field] => term_id
[operator] => IN
[include_children] =>
)
)
[relation] => AND
[table_aliases:protected] => Array
(
[0] => wp_term_relationships
)
[queried_terms] => Array
(
[category] => Array
(
[terms] => Array
(
[0] => 26
)
[field] => term_id
)
)
[primary_table] => wp_posts
[primary_id_column] => ID
)
[meta_query] => WP_Meta_Query Object
(
[queries] => Array
(
)
[relation] =>
[meta_table] =>
[meta_id_column] =>
[primary_table] =>
[primary_id_column] =>
[table_aliases:protected] => Array
(
)
[clauses:protected] => Array
(
)
[has_or_relation:protected] =>
)
[date_query] =>
[request] =>
SELECT SQL_CALC_FOUND_ROWS wp_posts.ID
FROM wp_posts LEFT JOIN wp_term_relationships ON (wp_posts.ID = wp_term_relationships.object_id)
WHERE 1=1 AND wp_posts.ID NOT IN (2605) AND (
wp_term_relationships.term_taxonomy_id IN (26)
) AND ((wp_posts.post_type = 'post' AND (wp_posts.post_status = 'publish' OR wp_posts.post_status = 'acf-disabled')))
AND ID NOT IN
(SELECT `post_id` FROM wp_postmeta
WHERE `meta_key` = '_pilotpress_level'
AND `meta_value` IN ('','employee')
AND `post_id` NOT IN
(SELECT `post_id` FROM wp_postmeta
WHERE `meta_key` = '_pilotpress_level'
AND `meta_value` IN ('' )))
GROUP BY wp_posts.ID
ORDER BY wp_posts.post_date DESC
LIMIT 0, 50
[posts] => Array
(
[0] => WP_Post Object
(
[ID] => 419
[post_author] => 2
[post_date] => 2013-09-20 03:51:16
[post_date_gmt] => 2013-09-20 03:51:16
[post_content] =>
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
I don't actively listen to the radio, but when my ipod dies I'll turn it on in my car. Maybe I'm older now, but I don't get it. The majority of the really popular stuff really offends me with its lack of substance, over-sexualizing of everything, trite messages, and cookie cutter sound.
This is top 40 radio, so the numbers of people in a younger age range that hear this stuff is HUGE! Why is it that when a female singer decides that they want to "grow up" and change their image it automatically relates to hardly wearing any clothes? Of course, the result seems to be so many girls that seem to be too young running around in very little clothing. We can assume that it wasn't really their decision to make, but more of a dictation by popular culture.
I've read about performers such as Rhianna claiming that they empower women while the stills from her latest videos seem to have her wearing only prosthetic lizard skin over her breasts. Where is the power in that? Where is the power in singing music that someone else has written and fitting into a cookie cutter overblown version of sexuality that seems to have been created?
I like to think of myself as open minded. Maybe I'm wrong, but I don't see strength and the definition of adulthood in these things. I see no personality. I see no control of oneself. As one who has long been involved in the music industry, I know that there are executives making these decisions to package these people in a very precise way...and it is so disheartening.
Pick up a guitar. Put pen to paper. Dress how you want, but do it with a CONVICTION that is YOU and not what you think you are supposed to be. Be intelligent. Speak your mind. Own your body. Do with it what rings true to yourself and not what peers or a particularly broken industry tells you to.
-Meredith DeLoca (Assistant Spa Director - The Dragontree PDX)
[post_title] => Being True to Yourself
[post_excerpt] =>
[post_status] => publish
[comment_status] => open
[ping_status] => open
[post_password] =>
[post_name] => true
[to_ping] =>
[pinged] =>
[post_modified] => 2020-08-03 19:44:16
[post_modified_gmt] => 2020-08-03 19:44:16
[post_content_filtered] =>
[post_parent] => 0
[guid] => http://www.thedragontree.com/blog/?p=419
[menu_order] => 0
[post_type] => post
[post_mime_type] =>
[comment_count] => 1
[filter] => raw
[webinar_id] => 0
)
[1] => WP_Post Object
(
[ID] => 8572
[post_author] => 3
[post_date] => 2022-03-13 12:00:19
[post_date_gmt] => 2022-03-13 12:00:19
[post_content] =>
Last week I discussed our tendency to get attached to a single point of view, and how this often keeps us stuck. When we recognize the validity of other perspectives – and allow that both sides are within us (and also in our adversaries, be they real or imaginary) – this helps to neutralize the issue. For a deeper and more thorough exploration, we can look at the two sides of an issue intersected with the push and pull of desire and fear (or attraction and repulsion). It’s a process Leslie Temple Thurston simply calls “squares.”
Here are some examples. If you find them challenging, I encourage you to work through them. If not, I hope they help you understand how the exercise works and lead you to the patterns that are relevant to you.
In this first example, we’re looking at the intersection of desire and fear with that of being in control versus out of control. Wanting control is a primary human motivator. A great many of our upsets can be traced to an underlying fear of being out of control. But pursuing control may amplify the belief that we’re not in control. This can be a tricky catch-22 to work with. So if you have a strong desire to be in control (upper right quadrant), you’d do well to address yourself to the fear of being out of control (lower left). These are easy for most people to access.
Can you think of a situation that arouses the fear of being out of control? Holding that in mind, what happens in your body? Can you feel some physical unease? What happens if you don’t resist that feeling? What happens if you even invite it to be felt with your whole being, willingly allowing it spread over you? And what happens when you imagine opening yourself, like opening a closed fist that contains a butterfly, and let it peacefully depart? If this process diminished the intensity of the feeling, but not completely, try doing it several times in succession. For more on this form of body-centered releasing, check out our book, Freedom.
Less obvious – but not uncommon – is the fear of being in control (lower right quadrant). If you’re in control, does that mean whatever happens is your fault? Maybe being in control feels like too much responsibility. If control issues are significant for you, I encourage you to do the process described in the last paragraph with the idea of situation in which you are in control. What comes up?
Last, there’s the desire to be out of control (lower left quadrant). Though this may seem totally foreign to someone who’s rigidly clenching around every aspect of life, there’s always a hidden part that yearns for the relief of being out of control. Anyone who’s ever been to a college party at the end of finals has witnessed plenty of desire to be out of control.
Try visiting with all four quadrants and journaling about how each state exists in you. You might also have fun with the following variation – desire and fear of independence versus dependence.
This is a major dynamic in kids and adolescents, and it’s not helped by the fact that parents often give mixed messages. On the one hand, we may be telling our kids to stay attached to the family, don’t try to get your needs met by your inept peers, and keep coming to us for support and advice. On the other, we’re telling them to grow up, do more things for themselves, get themselves ready for school, figure out their homework, and navigate new situations with minimal guidance. When we see them shifting their attachment from the family to their peers, we often mistake this for independence, when they’ve actually become dependent on peers for approval and direction.
It's probably easy for them to access the desire to be independent, even if it’s scary, because our society puts so much value on it. If we can help them recognize the other three quadrants, it may help to neutralize some of the inner and outer forces, and allow them to be accepting of where they are and comfortable with striking a balance.
Of course these dynamics don’t necessarily end when adolescence does. We may find ourselves struggling with the dimensions of dependence and independence in our adult relationships, and when handicapped, ill, or elderly. Exploration and peacemaking with these states may support a peaceful resolution.
Be well,
Peter
P.S. If you find this exploration interesting, perhaps you’d enjoy guiding others through processes like these. Check out the Dragontree Coaching Program. In the advanced Illuminator training, we go even deeper into these processes.
[post_title] => Meeting the Part of Yourself That Wants to Be Out of Control
[post_excerpt] =>
[post_status] => publish
[comment_status] => open
[ping_status] => open
[post_password] =>
[post_name] => meeting-the-part-of-yourself-that-wants-to-be-out-of-control
[to_ping] =>
[pinged] =>
[post_modified] => 2022-02-24 23:28:41
[post_modified_gmt] => 2022-02-24 23:28:41
[post_content_filtered] =>
[post_parent] => 0
[guid] => https://thedragontree.com/?p=8572
[menu_order] => 0
[post_type] => post
[post_mime_type] =>
[comment_count] => 0
[filter] => raw
[webinar_id] => 0
)
[2] => WP_Post Object
(
[ID] => 4884
[post_author] => 2
[post_date] => 2013-06-12 18:27:18
[post_date_gmt] => 2013-06-12 18:27:18
[post_content] => A mission statement is by definition: a statement of the purpose of a
company,
organization or
person, and its reason for existing. A mission statement should guide the actions of the organization, spell out its overall goal, provide a path, and guide decision-making. It provides “the framework or context within which the company’s strategies are formulated.” It’s like a goal for what the company wants to do for the world.
This last sentence is what truly resonates with me on what a mission statement should be. For the next few months, I’ve decided to dedicate my blog to the breakdown of the Dragontree Mission statement and our core values and what they mean to us.
Let’s start with our first line….”At the Dragontree, we are committed to peace.” The word peace comes from the Latin meaning “freedom from civil disorder”. Taking it out of the concept of government perhaps a better definition is “freedom from disquieting or oppressive thoughts or emotions and the existence of healthy interpersonal relationships.” This type of freedom from disquieting thoughts and emotions is a key element for us as human beings to be healthy physically and emotionally. Perhaps this is why the first line of our mission statement has to do with the concept of peace.
We as caregivers strive to create a peaceful existence for ourselves, which helps us provide treatments and service to our clients, creating space for peace in their lives.
At a personal level, peaceful behaviors are kind, considerate,
respectful, just, and tolerant of others’ beliefs and behaviors — all of this tending to manifest
goodwill.
-Robert G. (The Dragontree NW Spa Director)
[post_title] => The Dragontree Mission Statement (Part 1)
[post_excerpt] =>
[post_status] => publish
[comment_status] => open
[ping_status] => open
[post_password] =>
[post_name] => hello-world-3
[to_ping] =>
[pinged] =>
[post_modified] => 2019-05-26 02:08:44
[post_modified_gmt] => 2019-05-26 02:08:44
[post_content_filtered] =>
[post_parent] => 0
[guid] => http://www.thedragontree.com/?p=1
[menu_order] => 0
[post_type] => post
[post_mime_type] =>
[comment_count] => 0
[filter] => raw
[webinar_id] => 0
)
)
[post_count] => 3
[current_post] => -1
[before_loop] => 1
[in_the_loop] =>
[post] => WP_Post Object
(
[ID] => 419
[post_author] => 2
[post_date] => 2013-09-20 03:51:16
[post_date_gmt] => 2013-09-20 03:51:16
[post_content] =>
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
I don't actively listen to the radio, but when my ipod dies I'll turn it on in my car. Maybe I'm older now, but I don't get it. The majority of the really popular stuff really offends me with its lack of substance, over-sexualizing of everything, trite messages, and cookie cutter sound.
This is top 40 radio, so the numbers of people in a younger age range that hear this stuff is HUGE! Why is it that when a female singer decides that they want to "grow up" and change their image it automatically relates to hardly wearing any clothes? Of course, the result seems to be so many girls that seem to be too young running around in very little clothing. We can assume that it wasn't really their decision to make, but more of a dictation by popular culture.
I've read about performers such as Rhianna claiming that they empower women while the stills from her latest videos seem to have her wearing only prosthetic lizard skin over her breasts. Where is the power in that? Where is the power in singing music that someone else has written and fitting into a cookie cutter overblown version of sexuality that seems to have been created?
I like to think of myself as open minded. Maybe I'm wrong, but I don't see strength and the definition of adulthood in these things. I see no personality. I see no control of oneself. As one who has long been involved in the music industry, I know that there are executives making these decisions to package these people in a very precise way...and it is so disheartening.
Pick up a guitar. Put pen to paper. Dress how you want, but do it with a CONVICTION that is YOU and not what you think you are supposed to be. Be intelligent. Speak your mind. Own your body. Do with it what rings true to yourself and not what peers or a particularly broken industry tells you to.
-Meredith DeLoca (Assistant Spa Director - The Dragontree PDX)
[post_title] => Being True to Yourself
[post_excerpt] =>
[post_status] => publish
[comment_status] => open
[ping_status] => open
[post_password] =>
[post_name] => true
[to_ping] =>
[pinged] =>
[post_modified] => 2020-08-03 19:44:16
[post_modified_gmt] => 2020-08-03 19:44:16
[post_content_filtered] =>
[post_parent] => 0
[guid] => http://www.thedragontree.com/blog/?p=419
[menu_order] => 0
[post_type] => post
[post_mime_type] =>
[comment_count] => 1
[filter] => raw
[webinar_id] => 0
)
[comment_count] => 0
[current_comment] => -1
[found_posts] => 55
[max_num_pages] => 2
[max_num_comment_pages] => 0
[is_single] =>
[is_preview] =>
[is_page] =>
[is_archive] => 1
[is_date] =>
[is_year] =>
[is_month] =>
[is_day] =>
[is_time] =>
[is_author] =>
[is_category] => 1
[is_tag] =>
[is_tax] =>
[is_search] =>
[is_feed] =>
[is_comment_feed] =>
[is_trackback] =>
[is_home] =>
[is_privacy_policy] =>
[is_404] =>
[is_embed] =>
[is_paged] =>
[is_admin] =>
[is_attachment] =>
[is_singular] =>
[is_robots] =>
[is_favicon] =>
[is_posts_page] =>
[is_post_type_archive] =>
[query_vars_hash:WP_Query:private] => 1b17657df4ff14fc8c4f7a6379274510
[query_vars_changed:WP_Query:private] =>
[thumbnails_cached] =>
[allow_query_attachment_by_filename:protected] =>
[stopwords:WP_Query:private] =>
[compat_fields:WP_Query:private] => Array
(
[0] => query_vars_hash
[1] => query_vars_changed
)
[compat_methods:WP_Query:private] => Array
(
[0] => init_query_flags
[1] => parse_tax_query
)
)